Lists

Because of busy days ahead, I've decided to publish a few posts from the archives this week. The following post originally appeared November 27, 2007.

"One reason we are so harried and hurried is that we make yesterday and tomorrow our business, when all that legitimately concerns us is today. If we really have too much to do, there are some items on the agenda which God did not put there. Let us submit the list to Him and ask Him to indicate which items we must delete. There is always time to do the will of God. If we are too busy to do that, we are too busy."

~ Elisabeth Elliot ~

I like lists.

If I write it down, I remember it better and give myself permission to forget about it for a while (it makes sense to me).

When I was a new mother and began this SAHM gig, I made a list every day of what I hoped to get done. I even put down the tiniest of jobs, stuff like "Make bed" or "Take a shower" or "Unload dishwasher." It wasn't that I was THAT forgetful, I was merely groping for things to scratch off my list. The more I checked off, the more evidence of my accomplishments. The problem came when my plan for the day didn't always materialize. Sometimes a baby would be especially crabby or an unexpected visitor stopped or an impromptu trip to the store was necessary. At the end of many days I would look at my list and the war zone I called my living room and shake my head thinking, "What d'you do today, Tami, anything?"

Yet I realize you can't put a value on rocking a child or comforting a hurting soul. Extending lunch with a friend is more enriching than time-consuming. When I help a kid with trigonometry, I'm building a relationship. Plopping on the couch late at night, watching syndicated reruns is not wasted time. It is relaxing with my husband. Reading a good book does more for me than a spotless kitchen floor.

Now I'm more realistic. I allow for changes in my schedule. When I make my lists today, I don't limit them to time. My goal is to check things off within a span of a week or so. I don't include daily things like "Cook dinner" or "Pick up kids from school" or even "Exercise" (yes, I know what you're thinking). I WISH for unexpected phone calls or visitors to pull me away from things. I'd pick hanging with you any time over cleaning! My prayer each morning comes from Psalm 90:17,

May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us--yes, establish the work of our hands.

Amen, Lord. Your will be done.

A New View on Prayer

Because I've got some busy days ahead, I've decided to publish a few posts from the archives this week. The following post originally appeared November 30, 2006.


Do you ever get the feeling God is trying to teach you something profound, but you can't quite wrap your head around it? My mind is swarmed with thoughts about prayer, more specifically, faith in prayer.

I'm a firm believer prayer is important and powerful and essential. I have beseeched God earnestly for unselfish things, believing in every fiber of my being He could do it, but seen little results. I have fasted and seen exactly the opposite of what I asked for happen. I have been sure God could do the impossible and waited anxiously to see it unfold, only to watch life go on as normal. I have mustered up all the child-likeness I can to watch Him work in awe, only to feel Him saying, "Tami, did you really think it could be that easy? What do you learn from that?" I discovered recently this disappointment has taken a hit on my faith.

I reached a point where I didn't EXPECT God to answer positively and even worse, didn't always pray about issues because I was certain He wouldn't make it easy on me by "granting my wish." (Now there's a statement that reveals a lot!) I didn't think it mattered if I prayed about my problems because He would do what He thought best anyway. Don't misunderstand me, I still prayed, but with a defeated attitude, not truly believing He would do anything about it. I didn't trust God any less, but was convinced He was putting me through boot camp to toughen me up. He wanted me to suffer a little. I always loved Him and served with devotion, but prayed cautiously, not expecting much.

And then God did a surprising thing. He answered the prayers of people praying FOR ME. I felt the difference too acutely to dismiss it. Now I am left with thoughts of how to view prayer. How much should I expect from God? Should I ask for the impossible because He is God and absolutely has the power to do the miraculous? Or is that putting Him to the test? I believe He CAN do anything, but my downfall is I'm not convinced He WILL. It may not be what is best for me or for those I pray for. I know from experience God is not about magic fixes. We grow in our faith by persevering, especially when we don't understand. We grow by trusting when we don't get it, by hanging on to what His Word says is true, by believing Him even though we can't feel Him.

"And will not God bring about justice for His chosen ones, who cry out to Him day and night? Will He keep putting them off? I tell you, He will see that they get justice and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on the earth?" (Luke 18:7-8)

When Jesus comes, will He find me faithful? Will I persevere in prayer, especially when I don't get the answers I want? I suppose that is where the child-likeness comes in, being content with not understanding. (I'm certain the best part of heaven will be FINALLY knowing everything!!!) Without a doubt, my faith has matured and strengthened in my disappointment. God has done a work in my heart that is irreplaceable. I can honestly say I will love Him even if I never get my prayers answered how I'd like. (I admit, though, I'm almost afraid to say so. What if He decides to test me on that?!) When things are not going so well, I am still confident of His love for me.

So I'm revamping how I view prayer. Now I think of it as talking things over with God, not so much asking. I do a lot more of "Here's what I'm feeling, Lord. Here's what's going on" or "What do You think about that?" and a little less "Please help me with ________________." I am so thankful He hasn't given me everything I asked for. His plan HAS to be better than mine.

I'm not sure I grasp the whole idea of prayer, but I know I am to do it, so I will. And when the times of silence from God come, I will persevere. I will trust His judgment. Scripture tells us over and over God rewards perseverance. Hebrews 10:35-36 and James 5:11 are among my favorites, but the verse that spurs me on today comes from Jesus Himself, "but he who stands firm to the end will be saved." (Matthew 24:13)

Lord, thank You for teaching me about prayer. Thank You for stretching my faith and asking me to press on without answers. Continue Your work in me, despite my objections. I love You.

7 Quick Takes (Volume 109)

1) I hope you all enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday. We spent the day with BOTH mine and Kevin's extended families. The kids got to see every single cousin they have. Lots of people. Lots of food. Lots of laughter. Lots of fun. Great day.

2) Congratulations to Ladies Man who passed his test this week to obtain a Learner's Permit to drive. He's doing pretty well so far, but seems to have an affinity for the curb. He scared some poor jogging woman to death on his first test drive. But I think he'll be a fine driver with a little practice. He's got a perfectionist streak in him which will serve him well for this task.

Now, pray I keep it together in the passenger seat and remain calm. I mean it. PRAY!

3) Me: Ladies Man passed his driver's test today.

Miss Innocent One: Snap.

Ladies Man: Yeah, only my picture looks like I smoked a joint before I took it.

Miss Innocent One: A joint?

Ladies Man: You know, meth.

Me: Meth is not a joint. Marijuana is a joint.

Ladies Man: You can make a joint out of anything if you try hard enough. It's like my philosophy with things being edible. Anything's edible if you try hard enough.

He puts me in a quandary. Should I be more worried about him making joints or what his body is ingesting?

4) I've learned a new "skill" this week. We need a rock garden as part of our set for the church musical, so guess who got to do it? I started with a wooden block, covered in a layer of styrofoam (the wood underneath provides some weight for when the "rocks" get kicked).


I took each block back to my high tech work station and started carving on it with a knife.


After several minutes of sawing and shaping away, I ended up with products like this.


I made six free standing rocks like that and then paneled a platform with half pieces to make a rock garden.


And we aren't done yet. Each of the "rocks" gets covered in a special cloth and painted (that's the task today). I should mention this new skill comes with a cost however.


Being the superb klutz I am, I kept knicking my hand with the tip of the knife. Oh brother.

5) While I whittled my days away (literally) making "rocks" I couldn't help but think of Michelangelo, the famous artist. He believed sculptures resided within slabs of marble. He said his work was to find the art within. When I got tired of shaving away styrofoam, I told myself I was revealing the rock within. Doesn't that sound way more exciting, noble even? (I know. I need help.)

6) FYI--Do NOT talk to me right now about all the Christmas shopping you've finished. Aack! I don't want to hear about it. I have two stocking stuffers in a shopping cart in cyberspace and a little bit of candy stuffed in my closet (my kids better stay out of there!), but otherwise I've got nothing, nada, zip wad. You will do my sanity and nerves a favor by reserving your stories of shopping prowess for another time. Thank you very much.

7) You know it's coming, right? You can't get away from here without a plug for our musical. Sorry. It's my life right now. It's all I can think about.


I'd love to see you there. Make sure you come and say hi. I'll be swinging the power stick in the orchestra. Yee Haw!

Have a great weekend, friends.

I Don't Know Why

Lord, I don't know why You've blessed me.

I don't know why You gave me the desires of my heart in a husband who loves me more than I thought possible, who will forever be in my corner, holding my hand, navigating the rocky seas of life.

I don't know why You've given us children who love You, who aren't afraid to think for themselves, who fill our home with activity and laughter.

I don't know why You decided to make our extended families a treasured part of our lives, parents who back us up yet trust us to live our own lives, siblings we want to see more, cousins and nieces and nephews who enhance us.

I don't know why You've granted me quality relationships, people who see the real me and even like it, people who support me and love me and tell me what's true, wonderful friends who think the best without expectations.

I don't know why You've enriched our lives with an amazing church body, servants who love You and encourage us to do the same, who worship and think and challenge.

I don't know why You've given us gifts and the opportunities to use them.

Lord, I don't know why You chose me, a selfish, quiet, insignificant little girl. Why did You think I would be fit for Your family? Why did You decide to pour Your Spirit on me and let me be a part of Your work? Why have You surrounded me, my whole life, with people who lead me in Your way?

I don't know why You have blessed me, Lord.

But I am so very thankful. May I live my life in sincere gratitude to You.

Thank You dear Jesus.



Photo Credit: Puzzler4879

From The Mouth of Babes

Ready for a treat? I hope you enjoy this video as much I did.

The story of Jonah from Corinth Baptist Church on Vimeo.

Doesn't that just make you smile?

Have a great day friends!

You Can Always Come Home

You can always come home.

"We don't care what you do or what kind of trouble you get into," my parents said, "You can always come home."

Did their open door make me wild? Did I do whatever I wanted without regard for the consequences? Did I make bad decisions because it didn't matter what I did? Not at all. I wanted to make them proud. I did what I could to warrant their trust. I figured if they thought me worthy no matter what, I must have it in me to do what was right.

I didn't know at the time the foundation my parents laid. In a few simple words, they communicated my worth, their unconditional love, and wonderful security. They impacted not only my relationship with them, but my relationship with God, for He offers us the same peace of mind.

“Won’t the awareness God loves us no matter what lead to spiritual laziness and moral laxity? Theoretically, this seems a reasonable fear, but in reality the opposite is true…the more rooted we are in the love of God, the more generously we will live our faith.”

Brennan Manning
Lion and Lamb

My parents' love motivated me to be better, just like God's love. When I truly understand how He loves me, I want to make Him proud. I want to return His affection. His grace does not cause me to run amok. It inspires me to be all I can.

You can always come home.

Have you wandered from God's path? Have you gotten in some trouble? Are you ashamed of what you've done? Don't continually beat yourself up about it. Don't be afraid. Follow the example of the Prodigal Son. Return to the Lord and see how much He loves you.

Isn't that why Jesus came, so we could always come home?


In "Other" Words is hosted today by Patricia at Typing One-Handed. Pop over and see what others have to say about God's great love.

Have a great Tuesday, friends and never ever forget.

You can always come home.



Photo Credit: Eloise Mason

Freeing Me From Myself

I should have seen it coming the Sunday before Thanksgiving. The pastor talked about being thankful. The more he talked, the more I wanted to crawl under my chair.

I haven't been thankful lately. I've been whiny and envious and critical and punchy. I've been way too human.

But I am better than this. I've got the Holy Spirit within me, right?

. . . the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. (1 john 4:4)

I can do everything through him who gives me strength. (Phil. 4:13)

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts . . . And be thankful. (Col. 3:15)

Lord, cultivate a spirit of peace and thanksgiving in my heart. In your spirit, help me rise above my humanness instead of wallowing in it. You died to set me free from myself. Help me never forget.



Photo Credit: kabl1992

7 Quick Takes (Volume 108)

1) I usually get groceries on Monday, but somehow my day got away from me and I didn't get it done. Tuesday morning we were so low on food in the house that for breakfast Drama Queen went to Breakfast Club at church, Ladies Man made himself a massive turkey sandwich and Miss Innocent One ate bean dip and tortilla chips.

When I commented to the kids that this was yet another reason I won't be voted Mother of the Year, Ladies Man said, "You'll always be Mother of the Year in my heart, Mom, and in my liver and my lungs . . ." Somehow that erases all the sentiment, doesn't it?

2) Miss Innocent One is known in our house as slightly scatter brained. She made a goofy comment in the van the other day and Ladies Man romped on it.

Ladies Man: And you say you're not a blond?

Miss Innocent One: I'm not a blond . . . well, 50% of the time. I'm only a blond at home.

Me: Not at school?

Miss Innocent One: I can be a blond at home, but if I did that at school, kids would never let me forget it.

Frankly I think Drama Queen and Ladies Man are pretty tough critics, but they must not have traumatized her too much yet. Whew.

3) Miss Innocent One, Ladies Man and I were in Lincoln and drove right by Drummer Boy's apartment. Seeing his car there, Miss Innocent One asked if we could stop. So I called Drummer Boy to let us in the front door.

Me: Hey, we're sitting outside your apartment. Care if we stop in to say hello?

Drummer Boy: I don't care, but it's a mess.

I relayed the information to the other two.

Miss Innocent One: Hello? Like we've never seen his room?

We went on up and talked a little, then decided to take Drummer Boy out for dinner. (It was my only way to know he'd really eaten, you see, and this is what I live for--feeding my chicks.) While Drummer Boy got his shoes, Ladies Man snooped around his kitchen.

Ladies Man: Mom, I'm kinda scared to be in college.

Me: Why?

Ladies Man: Look.

He pointed to the pantry which held about three items, then gritted his teeth. No worries about grades or scholarships or tough professors for this guy. He's all about the food.

4) Whenever Kevin or I go up to watch Drummer Boy's drum line warm ups and rehearsals before Husker games, Drummer Boy always asks, "Is Drama Queen coming?" She hasn't been able to come with us all year, but finally got to see him do his thing last Saturday. I think he was glad to see her. What do you think?


He's convinced her to join him at the University of Nebraska next year and try out for the snare line too. Wouldn't it be cool to see them BOTH playing there?! Drama Queen practices her fool head off. She'll give it her best. They'd have a blast. And this mama would be busting!

5) Does anyone have any magic way to teach children how to change a toilet paper roll? Apparently all four of my children are completely clueless. I've done it right before their very eyes more times than I can count, yet no matter which bathroom I choose to visit in our home, there sits an empty cardboard tube on the dispenser and a partially used roll on the back of the toilet.

Maybe I should have asked to use Drummer Boy's bathroom and see if he's acquired the skill now that he has his own place. I don't have high hopes though. He specifically asked not to have a bed frame for his bed, setting his mattress and box springs right on the floor, so he wouldn't have to clean under a bed. This is the same guy who doesn't want a dresser because his clothes don't make it inside anyway.

See? More reasons I'll never attain Mother of the Year. Oy!

6) Ladies Man came downstairs dressed for school in shorts and a t-shirt.

Me: It's a high of 38 degrees today.

Ladies Man: I'll be inside all day. Chill out, Mom. . . Get it?

Oh brother. He also offered this little tidbit of information.

Ladies Man: I hope I get taller because I want to be more intimidating.

Me: Don't you think you already are?

Ladies Man: I need to be more intimidating to guys who want to hang out with Drama Queen and Miss Innocent One.

Me: You're keeping an eye on 'em, huh?

Ladies Man: Whenever sketchy guys try to talk to Drama Queen, I stand right there by them.

Me: Are you gonna look out for Miss Innocent One like that when she gets to high school?

Ladies Man: Mom, I already do. Why do you think I want to meet that kid who talks to her in band all the time?

Now isn't that sweet? Who says chivalry is dead?

7) Hey, all you southeast Nebraska friends need to listen to KUCV-FM (91.1) again this morning between 9 and 10. Kevin and I are promoting our upcoming Christmas musical on "Live at the Mill." At the very least, tune in and make fun of us behind our backs--whatever it takes to get you to listen! Better yet, just come to the production!


Yes, you can expect shameless promotions for the next two weeks. I can't help it. I'd love to see your smiling faces there.

Have a great weekend, friends and enjoy more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.

Throwing Me a Bone

I'd been feeling the familiar ache, the what-am-I doing-with-my-life feeling. My desire to be somebody tried to convince my flailing spirit I needed a change. I'd even prayed, "God, what else could I do?"

But as is His way, just when I started to question myself, just when I floundered thinking what I do doesn't matter at all, God threw me a bone.

While waiting at the high school to pick up kids, one of Drama Queen's friends came bounding for the van.

"Hey, I need to talk to you," she said, "I'm doing a photojournalism project where I have to take a bunch of pictures and I need your help. I'm supposed to get shots of people I want to be like. Can I take a picture of you as a stay-at-home mom?"

"Sure," I said, hardly believing my ears, stuffing the temptation to say something self-abasing.

"Great! I'll be talking to you!" she said with a smile.

I drove away still incredulous at what she asked. Why would she want to be like me? There's nothing exciting about my life. But instead of analyzing it (as is my terrible habit), I decided to accept it as a gift from God, a confirmation I'm doing what He wants me to do.

I took the bone, gave thanks and let it be. Progress.

And, Cutie Patootie, thank you for boosting this old lady's spirit.



Photo Credit: RaGardner4

Another Way to Love

We had the whole house to ourselves. The whole house. With no kids. For the entire evening.

The last time such an event occurred, we shared a magical evening spawning this post. So when I realized all our kids were going to be elsewhere, you could say I had high hopes.

But it had been a long day. He was tired and wanted nothing more than to veg on the couch. I decided to be gracious. Let him snooze there a while, I thought. Get him something to eat, give him some space, let him recharge and then he'd surely have some time for me.

So I cleaned up the kitchen, did a little laundry, did some cooking for the next day, even left to get a few groceries and he stayed planted. I did what needed to be done thinking when we put a movie in he'd want to get cozy.

Be he didn't. He enjoyed his liaison with the couch.

I wanted to be irritated. Who am I kidding? I was irritated. I barely kept the snippy at bay. I wanted to tell him I'd had a long day too, remind him I was up earlier than he was. I wanted to point out everything I'd done since we got home that he hadn't. But I kept my mouth shut. Instead I asked God how to handle the grrr I was feeling.

"This how you love him", God said, "by letting him have the kind of evening he wants to have. Love is patient and kind. It does not seek its own."

Is it bad of me to admit I didn't like His answer? Where was the justification for my feelings, the proof I was right? Why couldn't He tell my husband to be the bigger person instead of me? Hadn't I done enough? When did Kevin get a turn to push his desires aside for my sake?

Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not seek its own.

No matter what the other person does.

Truth be told, my husband's probably done it for me more times than I know. I've probably overlooked his attempts to let me have my way too.

So we had a perfectly boring evening. We watched a stupid movie that wasn't worth the time invested. Two of the kids came home and I waited up for the other while he went to bed. And though the evening didn't turn out as I hoped, I did accomplish one very great thing.

I loved my husband.

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Photo Credit: joesflickr

Pulling Away

“Remember this. When people choose to withdraw far from a fire, the fire continues to give warmth, but they grow cold. When people choose to withdraw far from light, the light continues to be bright in itself but they are in darkness. This is also the case when people withdraw from God.”

~Augustine~

Some people blatantly turn their back on God, thinking they know better. Some dare Him to prove them wrong. Some deny His existence all together.

But most of us don't CHOOSE to withdraw. We don't make a conscious decision to step out of the light. We're slowly pulled away by our own desires, our own ideas. The temptations offered from a clever devil woo us. We may not even sense our departure until we're cold, until the darkness surrounds us.

"Where are You, God?" we plead.

I'm where I've always been. Where are you?

When we hear His voice we realize we've done it again. I don't need to be told I wander from the fire. I know who I am. I feel the cold. I need to be told when I make the first step away.

Lord, show us when we start turning. Stop us as we lift our foot to walk away. Make us aware of our choices that pull us away from You.


Join Kathryn at Expectant Hearts for more on this quote.

7 Quick Takes (Volume 107)

1) Happy Birthday to Ladies Man who turns 15 today! Consider this your last year of safety. This kid is chomping at the bit big time thinking of the independence of driving. While you're treasuring every last minute of peaceful transportation, say a prayer for his parents who will endure enjoy teaching another teen to drive.


Ladies Man put a crimp in our schedule when he arrived three days early, ON A SUNDAY, my husband's biggest work day. For some insane reason Kevin scheduled a concert that evening too (I'll never understand why he did this. ALL of our kids came early and Ladies Man is child #3!). Thanks for the out, bub.

You've been a challenge, Ladies Man, but oh so rewarding too. Watching you come out of your shell in the last few years has been pure joy. You're turning into an awesome person. We're proud of you. Happy Birthday!

2) I'm also proud of Miss Innocent One who decided to run for student council, after being asked by countless kids to be their assistant. She didn't win, but I was stinkin' proud of the way she pulled her "campaign" together at the last minute, making posters and writing a speech. It takes guts to stand up in front of a hundred kids and tell them why you'd be a good representative for them. Her speech went something like this:

I wish I could promise you pizza every day, no homework, and no more running the mile in P.E., but I can't. What I can promise you is someone to listen to your concerns. You can count on me to take your problems to the principals or counselors and see what can be done.

Well said, Miss Innocent One. Good job.

3) More adventures in delightful dinner conversation:

Kevin: Who took my razor this morning? I really don't like walking down the hallway naked to get it out of your bathroom.

Miss Innocent One: Ew.

Kevin: I don't go naked. I put my jeans on.

Me: Even if he did do it naked, it's really not that bad of a sight.

Miss Innocent One: EW! MOTHER! We're about to eat!

Ladies Man: I don't think that's appropriate.

Me: You don't like it that I think your dad is sexy?

Miss Innocent One: Stop. Ew.

We changed the subject to kids growing up and moving out of the house.

Ladies Man: I can't wait to have my own place. No offense to you guys.

Me: I'm not offended. It's healthy.

Ladies Man: What? When I was little I told you I'd live with you forever so you would be happy.

Kevin: Trust me. We'll be fine. I'm looking forward to having your mother all to myself.

Ladies Man: Why, cause you think Mom is sexy?

Kevin: Mmm hmm.

Miss Innocent One: Ew.

Is there something wrong with us that we enjoy torturing the poor kids this way?

4) Get a load of my mother! She turned 68 last Thursday (ooh, I wonder if I'll get in trouble for that), but doesn't let her age hold her back. This week she TEXTED me! THREE TIMES! Nice work Mom. The younger generation has nothing on you.


5) We saw Drama Queen perform in her high school's production of Grease this week. For someone who has never had the desire to shake a pom pom, she made a pretty perky cheerleader. She looked so CUTE. But don't tell her I said that or I WILL be in trouble.

6) Drummer Boy is making me feel old and it has nothing to do with the fact that I married his father when he was the same age Drummer Boy is now. He's started using this new word and I find myself thinking, "Kids these days," as if I'm about 97. In texts, e-mails, on Facebook he punctuates any statement with "Boom." For instance, this week I saw on his Facebook status: "Drums. Chicken. Boom." I think it means "take that" or "I got the final say on the matter" but the fact that I'm guessing at the meaning only confirms I'm getting old.

It's the same feeling I had in our college study when they were trying to explain what a "tool" was and then looked completely clueless when we brought up Carol Burnett. Sigh. Maybe I need to hang out with my hip mother more (uh oh, Drama Queen would say I just showed my age again by saying "hip"). Ugh.

7) It's the time of year that takes extra effort to stay connected to my husband. The countdown has begun for opening night of our church musical. Is there something wrong with me that I hang out at church painting sets and go to rehearsals just to see him? I can't help it. I like the guy.

For those of you in southeast Nebraska, mark your calendars now!


That's all for today folks. Enjoy your weekend and take in more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.

My Prayer for You

Maybe I'm weird (shh, don't say it), but I constantly find myself wondering what's going on in the heads of people. As I watch those around me, I ask God what's knocking around in their minds. I concentrate on their eyes and see people in pain, struggling with their health, their marriages, their job situation. I see humans seeking respite from their problems. It makes me think of my favorite verse of Away in the Manger and I tailor it into a prayer.

Be near them, Lord Jesus, I ask Thee to stay
Close by them forever and love them I pray.
Bless all the dear children in Thy tender care
And take us to heaven to live with Thee there.
That is my prayer for you today friend. May God be near. May He stay close forever. May you sense His love.

Looking for Significance

"How is your writing?" they ask.

They take me off guard and I'm not sure how to answer the question, so I shrug.

They look to my husband to explain, "Kevin says you've been doing some writing. What are you working on?"

I tell them, and my list seems insignificant, unimpressive, almost silly. I suddenly feel like a little girl who's just announced she's learned how to tie her shoes all by herself. Big deal.

I spend hours at my computer typing words, many of which are read only by me, and in this moment, when called to give account for how I spend my time, I ask myself the question others have surely wondered.

WHY?!

There are no financial rewards, little encouragement and lots of time stuck in my head, which frankly my friends would say I could do without. And yet there's this drive within me, a woman who is definitely NOT a type A person, that must be placed there by God. He nudges me along with kind comments from others, confirming what I already know. I need to do this.

And so, shoving down my desire to be somebody (and I mean SHOVING), I say to these sweet people who've asked, "I don't know where we're going with it. I just do it. God's teaching me to wait on Him."

I want to do great big things for God and He says, "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Simmer down there Tam. Wait on Me. I've got the plan. I'm working it out for MY glory, not yours."

And so I keep typing, trusting God to make it mean something. For that is all anyone can do, isn't it? Apart from Him, we can do nothing.

Apart from Him, we'll struggle to find significance.

How about you? Do you want to make your mark? Do you want your time on earth to be remembered? Have you had that yearning to do something no one else can? Are you looking for significance?

We think we can find it by marrying Prince Charming, but once we do, we realize we have to feed him and wash his underwear. We land our dream job and feel instant stress to perform well. We think once we have babies our purpose in this world will be complete, but end up wondering how to hang on to our sanity at 3:AM with a screaming baby for the third night in a row. We become teachers and lawyers and accountants and nurses and psychologists (fill in the blank with your aspiration), assuming a title will bring the value we long to feel, the respect we desire. Yet we find ourselves spinning our wheels trying to achieve that which will never come.

Because if it isn't enough being God's child, if Jesus' sacrifice isn't enough to give us our significance, to tell us how important we are, we'll never be satisfied with the other blessings He brings our way.

If we can't see our value to God, how will we ever find it in the temporal things of earth?

My attempts to be "successful" are really my way of proving my worth to others, and worse, proving myself to God. I don't have to BE anybody. YOU don't have to be anybody. Want to find significance? Dwell on the cross. If you can't find it there, you won't find it anywhere.



Photo Credit: NCMallory

It's So Easy

What wonders a bit of encouragement can do! It’s one of the most awesome treasures God has given us – the ability to inspire, motivate, and reassure others.

Barbara Johnson

An e-mail.

A "how are you?" accompanied by eye to eye contact looking for the real story.

A message left on my voicemail.

An arm that snuck around to hold me unexpectedly.

An honest observation making me feel known.

Consistent, unashamed "I love you"s.

A returned phone call.

A comment from an acquaintance uttered while walking by.

A rejection letter which said I want to see these again.

An attempt to start conversation from someone who's always struggled with it.

A smile which said I'm happy to see you.

These are some of the ways my spirit's been buoyed this week. None took great thought. None consumed much time. But all lifted. All communicated value. These simple actions remind me it doesn't take much. I can build others up with the smallest effort.

A hand on an arm.

Saying out loud what I'm thinking when I see how her scarf makes her sparkle.

Taking the time to ask.

A wave and a wink from across the room, letting them know they're noticed.

A comment on a Facebook status.

Going out of the way to say hello.

Looking the checker in the eye when taking the receipt.

Honest communication which relays trust.

It's so easy. Isn't it exciting to think how we can make each other stand taller by being genuine and courageous enough to put ourselves out there a little for the sake of another?

It makes a difference. Every action, no matter how small, matters. But it's not just a nice thing to do. It benefits their spiritual journey as well.

But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.

Hebrews 3:13

Go ahead. Do it. Push yourself to say it. Motivate. Inspire. Reassure. Spur someone on in their faith.

What can you do today?

Join our host Deborah and Chocolate and Coffee for more interpretations on this quote.

Is There Any Wonder I Crave Quiet?

7 Quick Takes (Volume 106)

1) Miss Innocent One went with me on a major Walmart run. I thought it sweet of her to accompany her mother on the dreaded task, but realized later she had ulterior motives.

Miss Innocent One: Can we see if the comforters are on sale yet?

She's been dying for a new comforter set ever since Drama Queen moved into her new room with all her new stuff. I've been putting her off because she doesn't really NEED a new comforter set, but decided to humor her since she was nice enough to come along. Sadly for her, the coveted comforter was still not on clearance and her mother said no. Again.

Miss Innocent One: But my comforter is a piece of junk. It's got strings all over it.

I kept on walking.

Miss Innocent One: You said I could get another one if it went on sale.

Me: And it's not.

Miss Innocent One: But you're spoiling my dreams.

For that she got a good eye roll, yet her requests kept coming.

Can I get some sugary cereal? No.
Can I get a cell phone? No.
Can we get birthday cake ice cream? (EW!) No.
Can I get some gum? I'll make it last a month. NO!

Miss Innocent One: See? You're constantly spoiling my dreams. Thanks a lot Mom.

And now her standard phrase for anything is "You're spoiling my dreams." Does anyone else think she may need a name change?

2) We went to a great concert Wednesday night. Drummer Boy is a music composition major and every semester the composition students host a recital called Wet Ink! to present their work. Drummer Boy's piece was a woodwind quintet which is pretty impressive considering he's a drummer. We heard two movements from the work and according to his composer dad, it was very well done. Nice job Drummer Boy! We're proud of you.


He cleans up pretty good too, huh?

3) Kevin walked into the high school the other night during musical rehearsal and was greeted warmly by teachers and students alike.

Mr. Boesiger!
Hey Kevin!
Hi Mr. Boesiger. How are you today?
Look. Kevin's here.
How's it going?

But when his very own daughter caught sight of him, all she could say was, "What are YOU doing here?"

Ouch Drama Queen. Ouch.

4) I forgot to show you one of the purchases Ladies Man made on our bra shopping day. He found a sweatshirt he loved. When he tried it on, he found it had headphones built right into the drawstrings for the hood. BONUS for him. And it was on sale for half price. BONUS for me! He thought it the best thing ever until he actually used the built in headphones.


Somehow in his excitement he didn't think about how it would look to see the strings hanging from his ears. Woof, woof!

5) Ladies Man teases a girl from school calling her "Kidney" because her last name starts with a K and has the same amount of letters. Of course he does this to get her riled up and quite possibly in hopes she will touch him even if it is a smack on his arm. He was quite pleased with himself the other day when the girl's mother came to pick her up and rolled down her window to yell, "Are you coming, Kidney?"

How does he charm even the mothers he's never met?

6) Just when I think Drummer Boy is growing up, I see videos on Facebook (I tried to get clips, but they show up as unavailable) of him eating a sandwich, doing floppy hands, crossing one eye at a time in a very creepy way, playing a ditty on the piano. Goofy kid!

7) Miss Innocent One: Mother! Will you cut up a pear for me?

Me: No.

Yep, still spoiling her dreams. Shouldn't a twelve-year-old be able to handle such a task? And if she can't, isn't it time she learned?

Miss Innocent One: Mother! Why not? What if I was going to die unless I ate a pear?

Me: Maybe.

Miss Innocent One: Maybe?!

Me: It would take an awful lot of convincing me you'd DIE if you didn't eat the pear.

Miss Innocent One: MOTHER!

Me: Why are children always yelling at their mothers?

Miss Innocent One: It's what kids do.

Me: It's annoying.

Miss Innocent One: Mothers survive it.

Me: Yeah, only so they can see their grandchildren do it to their children.

Mothers unite! Hang on for the torment of your children too. While you're waiting, catch more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary. Have a great weekend friends.

In This Moment

My husband drops into bed with a sigh. Everyone is worried about money these days and our family is no different.

I snuggle in close. In the quiet of the night, the tasks of the day completed, the warmth of my true love next to me, I ask him.

In this moment, does it matter?

If we concentrate on the good, the beautiful, the eternal, can we silence the anxiety?

I think of my wonderful mother, whose birthday is today (HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM! I LOVE YOU!), and in my quiet reflection of the consistent blessing she is, in this moment, my empty wallet means nothing.

Watching my family banter back and forth at the dinner table, in wonder of the way God is shaping my kids, in this moment, who cares what my bank account registers?

I sing praise to God on a Sunday morning, flanked by some of my favorite people, the voices of hundreds filling the room in one purpose. The presence of God overwhelms me and a tear slips out, not because I fear my economic future, but because I know in this moment God holds me in the palm of His hand.

The baby reaches for me, his chubby hands brushing my cheek, his wiry hair just begging to be rubbed and in this moment, in God's beauty flowing out of this precious child, the world seems simple and right. All I feel is great gratitude for God's goodness, not concern over providing for the future.

At the end of a long day, exhausted and spent, I fall into an oversized chair with my husband, our limbs tangled comfortably. He laughs at my stupid comments about the t.v. show we're watching and the cares of the day float away. In this moment I don't worry about how to pay for the rising costs of a growing family. I see His faithfulness before me.

Do money stresses wear you down? Do you worry about how you'll pay for upcoming bills? Do dollar signs flash in your weary mind? Don't go there. Live now. Live here, in the middle of your blessings.

In this moment.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Matthew 6:34

Photo Credit: The Wandering Angel

Just In Case You Fear The Future

My spirit droops and I call out to God.

God, I'm tired of worrying about the same thing over and over.

He answers clearly.

So don't. Your worry is a choice. Quit dwelling on it and trust Me to take care of it. Remember what is TRUE:

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Matthew 6:34

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on our own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.

Lamentations 3:21-23, 25-26

For I am the Lord your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

Isaiah 41:13

I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

Psalm 27:13-14

Be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord, friends. Resist the temptation to worry. Remember what is true.



Photo Credit: Parvin

Bring Him By

Then Jesus made a circuit of all the towns and villages. He taught in their meeting places, reported kingdom news, and healed their diseased bodies, healed their bruised and hurt lives. When he looked out over the crowds, his heart broke. So confused and aimless they were, like sheep with no shepherd. “What a huge harvest!” he said to his disciples. “How few workers! On your knees and pray for harvest hands!”

Matthew 9:36-38 (The Message)

Some weeks all you get is bad news. Last week was one of them at our house. The final blow was a phone call from a friend saying her daughter was in jail. The family has been through a lot in the last year and I hurt for them. I hung up the phone and the tears escaped.

There's so much pain in this world. So much uncertainty. So many opportunities to trust God. And the pain is not picky. It targets those who love God and those who don't. People everywhere need the love of God in their lives. They need to know He can sustain them. Yet I look at myself and all my weaknesses and wonder how I can possibly put a dent in helping others. What is a sympathetic friend to do?

We need to do it together. We need to pray for Christians to rise up and get out there. But even that overwhelms me. I'm a middle-aged homemaker. What can I do? What can you do? How do we make a difference in the lives of hurting people?

Do you know Jesus? Bring Him by.

Soothe others by bringing them into His presence in you. You don't have to have eloquent words or memorize an entire book of scripture. No fancy salvation speech is necessary. Your being there ushers them to the throne of God.

Bring Him by.

I don't have flashy counseling skills or know the right places to direct people or the ability to explain how God works, but I've got good ears and a strong shoulder and arms that know how to hug. I am a worker in the kingdom merely by showing up, exposing them to Almighty God in me.

Will you join me? Will you help with the harvest? Will you answer the call?

Bring Him by.


Visit our host MiPa, my favorite Brit, and see what others think about this passage at Miriam Pauline's Monologue.



Photo Credit: SLR Jester