I'm spending TONS of time this summer writing a script for a Christmas musical. I can't tell you how many days my thought process goes awry.
What were you thinking? You can't do this!
No one is going to give a rip about this story.
Does this make any sense at all?
WHO CARES?!
What do you know about writing? You're a math major for crying out loud!
BORING!
You're going to spend all this time and it will be ho hum.
I hate this. I got nothin'. GRRRRRRR.
Is there any way I can get out of this?
Most days I have to make myself sit at my computer. It's easy to ignore it when life presses in or the sun beckons me outside or a book is calling my name or laundry needs to be folded or there's emails to be sent, bills to be paid, people to have coffee with, bathrooms that need cleaning, Facebook begging to be checked, floors to be vacuumed . . . I'll use any excuse to avoid it.
But avoiding it doesn't get the job done and for reasons I don't understand, God has given me this task. I have to do it.
So though I feel inept for the job, though everything in me would rather be doing something else, I sit myself down for a few hours each day and give it a shot. Some days little gets done. Some days I'm surprised at what comes out. But every day I keep in the back of my head the words of David.
I must do my part--show up. As I am faithful to do that, God is faithful to bring the ideas. And every year, to my astonishment and delight, a script gets finished.To the faithful you show yourself faithful . . .
Psalm 18:25
It's true for other areas of my life where I feel inadequate too. I'm not the best mother in the world, but He fills in my gaps as I keep at it every day. No matter how well I prepare for Bible study, there's always a little twinge of nervousness going in, knowing one comment could send discussion in an unexpected direction. A clarinet player is only as good as the reed on her horn which changes often. I might not know the right thing to say to a hurting person. But in every case, I push through and do it anyway, resting in the assurance of His faithfulness to me as I make myself available. If I do my part, He'll do His.
It takes the pressure off and puts things in perspective. I'm not writing a script. God is. I don't have to make it beautiful. God will. I just have to show up.
To the faithful He shows Himself faithful.
That's a promise to spur us on, to remind us it's not up to us. It tells us to keep going in and be patient and wait for the amazing things God will do. We don't have to do it all. We just do our part.
How can you be faithful to see His faithfulness?
Photo Credit: apollonio&battista
2 comments:
Tami,
It sounds as if you write one of these scripts EVERY year? Oh my, now that takes courage.
Good for you! Blessings to you and have a great week.
Marsha, we do write these every year. I write the scripts while my husband writes original music. Some years we write one for Christmas AND one for a shorter, sillier summer production. If you think of it, I would appreciate your prayers as I work. I'm hitting a wall and it needs to be finished soon. Thanks, friend, for your affirming words.
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