So I'm cruising along, following the path laid out before me, when suddenly, without warning, I hit a bump, a HUGE bump. "How could this happen?" I ask myself over and over. I've observed all the regulations. I've been focused. I've not strayed from the road. I have never been more in tune with my "global positioning system". How could I hit such a bump?
Trying to figure out how it happened did not change the fact that it did. I had a choice to make. I could let the bump stop me and my journey or I could attempt to repair the damage, take a pit stop, refuel and get back in the car. Now I'm no dummy. I knew the right choice, but it was easier said than done. It required utter humility and acceptance that I won't get how God works sometimes. I gathered up my battered body and thanked God for the bump, not necesssarily with joy at first. But I noticed as I did what was right, my heart eventually caught up. I can honestly say I see many good things resulting from my bump experience now. I can say they were worth the pain. Don't you have to stand back in awe and wonder at how God does that?
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." (Proverbs 3:5-6) The path may be straight, but some days it feels as though I'm walking over rocks with bare feet. It smarts a little, but I will not choose what appears to be an easier route. You see, deep down, I love God so much, I just have to get back in that car. I may not understand. I may feel shaken, but if I want to honor Him, I have to obey Him. If YOU love Him, you have to obey Him. You have to do what is right.
Romans 11:29 tells me, "for God's gifts and His call are irrevocable." I can't give them back (neither can you, by the way). I can't deny they exist. Whether I "feel" like it or not, I am responsible for them in the same way I am obligated to my children whether I feel like being a mother or not. My gifts and my calling are part of me. Your gifts and calling are part of you. We can't ignore them. We have to use them, no matter how hard it may be sometimes. We may be tired and not too crazy about how vulnerable they make us, but if we love Him, we will press on and use them.
God woke me up this morning with these gentle words: "I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." (Isaiah 41:9-10,13)
Mmmmm. Don't you just love that? Don't you want to believe it? I CHOOSE to believe it. Will you? Will you, along with me, take a deep breath and say, "Okay, Lord, lead the way"? I'm grabbing God's hand and officially getting back in my car now. I may be driving a little slower, but I'm picking up speed. I pray I see you on the road too. Hey, maybe we can car pool some time.