When You Don't Like The Plan

I was drawn to Christianity when Pastor Jeambey said God had a special plan for my life. I wanted that. Oh, how I wanted that. I wanted to be more than what I perceived I was. I wanted my life to have divine purpose. Somehow that meant I was special too.

I've held onto that idea since I was a teenager. And God has proven Himself faithful. I trusted He had things under control and would bring about what was best for me. I don't doubt He's got me covered.

But sometimes (I'm almost scared to say it), sometimes I don't like the plan.

Sometimes the plan seems awful and I'm not sure how I'll live through it. Sometimes it requires pain, lots of it, and I don't understand. Sometimes the plan robs my sleep and steals my joy and makes me do things alone. It puts a sick feeling in my stomach and produces buckets of tears. It takes my people away and stomps on my dreams and leaves me feeling confused and bewildered.

Sometimes the plan just sucks and there's nothing I can do about it.

Yet I have to believe it's for my best. Because if I don't, how do I get out of bed in the morning? How do I face each day thinking God's got it out for me? How do I ever find peace and joy and gratitude for hidden blessings?

I have to believe His plan is best. I have to. Call it naiveté or foolishness if you want, but doesn't trusting God help us cope? Does believing He's on the job, even though you hate what's happening, give hope? Can He use that trust to mold something beautiful into us? When I don't like the plan, won't blaming Him make it worse?

I have to assume His way will be something I am thankful for eventually. And though it may take my heart a while to catch up, that's okay. The believing helps me move on, keeps me going, and strengthens my faith.

I'm reminded of an old song by Babbie Mason. If you're struggling with God's plan for you right now, I pray this touches your heart.


When you don't like the plan, trust His heart, friend. Remember who He is and believe beyond all belief that He'll work it out for good somehow. The first verse I ever memorized was Proverbs 3:5-6. Thirty-five years later it's still a life line for me in days when I hate the plan.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6

God is good. And He is faithful. Even when we don't understand.

Believe it.

It Doesn't Get Any Easier

The sweet, white-haired man opened the door for me, forced a smile, then followed me to the reception desk, his head hanging. He murmured to the woman behind the counter and I heard her say, "It doesn't get any easier, does it?"

"No," he said with a sigh, dragging his body through the waiting room, spotting a woman he knew.

"How ya doing?" he asked, taking a seat next to her.

"Oh, I'm getting along. It's tough," she responded.

"It doesn't get any easier, does it?"

"No. It just gets worse."

They sat there shaking their down-turned heads, their eyes distant and sullen.

"I hear you moved?" he finally offered.

"Yeah. I couldn't stay there."

"Too many memories," he said, really to himself, "Everything reminds me of her, even stuff in the refrigerator."

"Yeah, too many memories," she repeated, "I find myself wanting to come home and tell him what happened in my day, who I ran into, what I saw . . . but I can't."

"I talk to the neighbors."

"But at some point you have to shut the door and be alone," she sighed.

"It doesn't get any easier . . . "

"I guess we can be thankful we had nearly 60 years with them."

"Yeah."

She was called back to a room, but added as she walked away, "Good talking to you."

"Yeah. You too. Take care now."

I wanted to cry.

Loss.

Life is full of it. Though I haven't lost my spouse, I've faced my share of losses throughout my lifetime, not only the death of loved ones, but dreams, hopes, relationships. The longer I live, the greater probability I have for more loss. It's inevitable. I'd be depressed about that except for one thing.

This life is not all there is.

I have hope and joy and real peace because I know WHO holds me and controls the universe.

That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

God is using the pain and loss of today and redeeming it in a glorious way I may not see now. But I am promised it won't be wasted.

Are you dealing with loss today, friend? Don't despair. KNOW that God causes all things to work together for the good of those who love Him. KNOW that our present suffering is not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. KNOW you are wholly and dearly loved, seen and heard, and cared for by Almighty God.

It may not get any easier, but it won't be for naught. We won't escape loss, but we can trust God to make it beautiful, to make US beautiful in the grieving, to make it matter.

For eternity.

That's the kind of hope I yearn for, the kind of promise I desperately cling to. How about you?

Do you want to know your pain is not wasted?

How Can I Do for You, God?

Not what can I do. How. How can I represent You instead of myself? How can I make everything, every activity, every word, every action about You? How can my puny efforts matter in Your eternity?

How can I do

my family,
my work,
my relationships,
my ministry,
my life

for You?

How can an ordinary woman from Nebraska make a difference in Your kingdom? What can I possibly do that thousands couldn't do better? How do I make this life count?

I know I'm supposed to work at everything with all my heart, "as working for the Lord, not for men." I know I must die to myself. I know I'm not to look for the approval of men. But how does that help me decide the best way to spend the next half hour? How do I work hard at relationships and on my gifts at the same time? How do I fit it all in? How do I figure out what's most important?

All this thinking and planning and evaluating is exhausting and leads me to wonder, really, how can my work, my life, matter that much, both in this world and to You? I am one person in a planet full of people, many more skilled than I.

Yet Your words reverberate in my mind . . . I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, "You are my servant"; I have chosen you and have not rejected you.*

I know You spoke these words to the Israelites, Your chosen people, yet they always stir me, as if You're speaking directly to me. I want it to be true for me. Oh, how I want that. Could You really have a special plan for me, for each of Your children? Can You be big enough to accomplish that? I can't comprehend it, but I don't have to.

I just have to believe it.

For when I believe it, I look for You to make it so.

Is it as easy as aligning myself with You, Lord? Is it throwing "off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles," and running "with perseverance the race marked out for us"? Is it merely fixing "our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith"? Is it a matter of coming to You each day and waiting for an assignment?

How can I do for You, God?

I think You tell me to draw near, to come to You with expectation and hope.

And let YOU do it.

Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Humble yourself before the Lord and he will lift you up.

James 4:8, 10

I will believe, Lord. Make it so.



*Isaiah 41:9

I Have to Hope

I look at it and don't see how it will work out. I pray about it, all the time, and have for years, yet things don't seem to change.

But You whisper, "Trust Me."

There's much to be thankful for and I am, but the issue persists. It's not a life and death situation, but it's close to my heart and I want better. But it doesn't come.

You say, "There's a plan. Hang on."

TRUST Me.

You leave me with a choice.

I can lay awake at night and worry and rack my brain for a solution I won't come up with or I can trust You, choose to leave it in Your hands.

Easier said than done.

But the more times I have to do it, the stronger my resolve grows. I WILL believe You, because I have to. If I don't trust, beyond all I can see, that You'll take care of it, I have no hope and then what am I left with?

Fear.

Worry.

Anxiety.

But WITH You?

The possibility of hope and peace.

That is what faith is, isn't it, believing what we cannot see? Isn't this what Abraham is commended for?

Even when there was no reason for hope, Abraham kept hoping—believing that he would become the father of many nations. For God had said to him, “That’s how many descendants you will have!” And Abraham’s faith did not weaken, even though, at about 100 years of age, he figured his body was as good as dead—and so was Sarah’s womb.

Abraham never wavered in believing God’s promise. In fact, his faith grew stronger, and in this he brought glory to God. He was fully convinced that God is able to do whatever he promises. And because of Abraham’s faith, God counted him as righteous.

Romans 4:18-22

We can have that same faith, friends, but it comes at a price. We'll have to deliberately choose to trust His way of handling it, though it may not be the way we like and take far longer than is comfortable. We have to trust God above all else, no matter what, even with our hardest problems, our toughest challenges. We have to.

What is the alternative?

Without blind, child-like faith, there is no hope, is there? And who can live without hope? Who can get up each morning without the possibility of better, without thinking of what a new day may bring?

I choose to believe God's got it handled.

I choose hope.



Photo Credit: cobalt123

A Sweet Moment or What a Mother Hopes for Her Kids

Drama Queen's been working hard all summer to get in the best shape possible for drum line camp at the University of Nebraska. Competition is steep and she's felt the pressure, but true to who she is, her determination motivates her to put in the practice time, hours upon hours every week. At home in her room at all hours of the day, in the driveway in her swimsuit in the heat of the afternoon, at friends' houses, anywhere, any time. Her practice pad and sticks are like car keys to the rest of us. They go everywhere with her.

So when the doctor used the definitive word "fracture" and punctuated it with "slow healing bone," Drama Queen couldn't hold back the tears. This year's season is probably out for her. Her hard work culminated not in a pride of all Nebraska band uniform, but a Husker red cast.

Soon she texted her brother, Drummer Boy, who as a snare drummer on the University line had an interest in her outcome. He's been her role model, her instructor, her cheerleader, her supporter. He's the one dragging her to drum line mini-camps and encouraging her to try out for things. The common interest of drumming brought them closer through the years. Though Drama Queen's father and I don't consistently get the obsession, Drummer Boy always relates to her.

Because of that, it seemed fitting to meet him for some food after we left the doctor's office. Drama Queen wasn't hungry and would have loved to crawl into bed with the covers over her head, but it had been a while since we talked with her brother and we both missed him. Honestly I hoped he might cheer her up a little, but I didn't imagine he would touch me so.

Without any greeting, Drummer Boy walked into the restaurant, made a beeline for his sister, grabbed her into a big hug and just held her there a while. She sank into his chest and did her best to hold back the tears.

And so did I.

It reminded me of this picture taken over a year ago after a disappointing finish at drum line championships.


It's the kind of scene a mother doubts will ever occur as she listens to her kids fight over toys and who ate the last popsicle and taking too much time in the bathroom and making somebody late for school. I suppose years of bickering and learning how to live together made it that much sweeter. One hug told the real story. My kids love each other.

I'm sorry for the bad news that preceded it, but will forever treasure the memory of that moment. Our kids will be there for one another, even when we cannot. They're bound together apart from our influence.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow.


For more Thankful Thursday posts, visit Lynn and Dineen at Spiritually Unequal Marriage.

The Little Stuff

Life wears on me.

Last week nothing monumental happened, nothing tragic or earth shattering, yet I deemed it a rotten week. Trouble in a relationship, unexpected major expenses, growing pains in our family, raging hormones and inconveniences which felt like they might send me over the edge, sapped my strength.

I asked God more than once, "Why does life have to be so hard?"

Can you guess the answer? I know I've talked about it before.

It doesn't have to be. TRUST ME!

If we can trust God for our eternal salvation, how can we not trust Him to provide for the “little” things of life?”

M.E. Howard

It's not that I don't trust Him, but Satan masterfully uses the "little stuff" to distract me from what I know to be true. He's the one who suggests I may lose it. He gets my mental calculator humming. He brings the worries to mind and throws in annoyances to keep me off kilter. He knows all he has to do is adjust my eyesight slightly and I'm a goner.

And I let him do it!

It's time to start fighting back and remembering what is true instead of falling for what isn't. Will you join me? When the "little stuff" wears on you, will you gain peace of mind and freedom from anxiety by focusing on God's promises instead of the problem? I gotta admit I really stink at this. I'm a dweller. I'll need your help. Remind me to rest in words like this, okay?

. . . those who hope in me will not be disappointed.

Isaiah 49:23

Amen Lord. Renew our hope. Keep us focused on Your Truth.

Join our host, Urailak, at Living for God for more takes on this quote.

Not Letting the Devil Steal My Anchor

I prayed for my parents from the time I was old enough to understand what prayer was. Whenever the "D" word came up in their arguments, I'd go to my room, crawl under the covers and pray. God was supposed to be bigger than anything. If something could be done, He would be the One to do it.

Throughout my childhood, He provided small miracles, years where things were good between Mom and Dad. I thought my prayers were “working.” As I graduated from high school and left home, I knew they were in a down time, but I kept praying. God kept them together year after year and I trusted He would continue as long as I held up my end of the deal, coming before Him consistently and persistently.

But two days before my 29th birthday, in my 8th month of pregnancy with my second child, my biggest fear of childhood came true. My parents announced they were getting a divorce.

My pain came not only from my parents’ parting, but from my disappointment in God. Why did He stop hearing my prayers? Why now, after decades of earnest pleas, did He suddenly say no? Did He ever hear me? Could He be trusted with anything else? I was left in a funk for many months, being angry with God for what I perceived as His slap in my face, my prayers only questions, asking Him if I’d ever feel happy again.

Though I struggled, I couldn't shake the fact that He HAD done miracles in my life. He HAD proven Himself worthy in the past. It was this one thing, this one major thing He denied. Would I let the disappointment alienate me from Him? I had to ask myself which was worse, losing the family I'd always known or losing my faith?

I searched for the answers in the book of Job. Though he lived an upright life, Job was well acquainted with grief. God allowed Satan to torment him for no other reason than to prove he was a faithful servant. Is this the way God treats those He loves? Job had the same questions I did. What was God's answer to him?

Who are you?! Who are you to question Me? I am God. I created everything and will determine how everything will happen. What do you know, you human?

That's the Tami version of what He said, but you get the idea. Job encountered the living God and articulated the result well, "I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted. You asked, 'Who is this that obscures my counsel without knowledge?' Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know."

His words pierced my heart. God is God. Would I believe it and live like I did, accepting the good AND the bad? Or would I succumb to the taunts of a crafty serpent who took cheap shots? Satan whispered, "See? God doesn't really care about you. Look what happened to your parents. It doesn't matter how good you are or how hard you pray. God does whatever He wants, even if it hurts you." It was easy to wallow in his suggestions. I had every right to be uspet, didn't I?

But where did dwelling get me? How could I ever move on or heal if I stewed about how God let me down? I had to choose whether I would believe the best about Him or walk away, an even scarier prospect. I chose to rest in Him and His unknown and noticed when I trudged forward without blaming anyone, when I quit demanding an explanation, when I chose to trust the goodness of God in my pain, the sneaky suggestions diminished.

“Nothing irritates Satan more than us choosing God over our pain and suffering. We can endure everything if we know Jesus is sitting next to us."

by Joni Erickson Tada

My parents splitting up was bad, but it would be worse to lose my family AND my faith. I had to choose to believe God knew what He was doing. If I continued to blame Him, Satan would win. And I'd be left with nothing. How could I let him steal my anchor?

What are you facing this day, my friend? What tragedy, what trauma makes you doubt God? What lies does Satan whisper to you? Will you let him steal your faith too? When you choose God, though you may not understand and your heart hurts, you defeat the enemy, clearing the way for God's light to shine in your darkness, leading to a life of hope. Don't fall prey. Believe in the goodness of God and send Satan packing.

Don't let the devil steal your anchor.

See other thoughts spawned by this quote by joining Karen at In Love W.I.T.H. Jesus.

A Way to Cope

Hours before my dad's funeral, I walked into the church and greeted my sister. Upon seeing each other, tears filled our eyes. We embraced, then stared at the floor.

"This completely sucks," I said to break the tension.

I don't even remember her comeback, but it started a series of one-liners, the kind of comfortable banter we'd grown up using, the sort of silliness that always ended in laughter. It wasn't irreverence for our father, but a way of coping with our grief. It was a moment of release, a glimmer of normalcy, of hope, knowing life would go on, though this particular day would go down as one of our worst.

“Hope fills the afflicted soul with such inward joy and consolation, that it can laugh while tears are in the eye, sigh and sing all in a breath; it is called “The rejoicing of hope”

by William Gurnall

Hope is God's gift of blessed relief. It helps us rejoice in the middle of rotten days. Hope says, "This is not all there is. Something grander awaits." It shouts, "Better days are ahead." It reminds, "Though we don't know what God's doing, we know He is good." Hope whispers, "Trust. Rest. Believe. Know."

And when we dare to listen, when we let it seep into our shell-shocked minds, our sorrow is lessened, our burden lifted. A light pierces our darkness. Can you hear it?

This is not all there is.
Trust.
Better days are ahead.
Believe.
Rest.
God is good.
Know.

Hoping is not naive´. It does not deny an awful situation. Hoping is coping.

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

Romans 5:1-5

Hope does not disappoint. Though our hoped for results may not come this side of heaven, they will come. Let yourself believe His best, my friend. Above all odds, trust His plan. Know He still works, though you may not see it. If you fan the flame of hope, rejoicing can come in your mourning.

Hoping is coping.

To see what thoughts this quote inspired in others, visit Twinkle Mom at Sunflower Faith.

Hope Really Does Float

I'd love to be a writer, a real writer who makes money crafting thoughts and emotions on the page. But I'm not. I work hard at it. I spend a lot of time at it, more time than seems warranted since it doesn't pay off financially. With changes in the market due to electronic publishing and the advent of the Kindle and iPad, the odds of getting a book published get slimmer every day. Daunting. The competition is fierce. Publishing houses are dwindling and becoming more selective. It seems impossible.

Yet God nudges my spirit. He causes me to will and to act. He brings the words, the energy, the motivation. He dares me to hope for the impossible.

“Oh, remember this: There is never a time when we may not hope in God. Whatever our necessities, however great our difficulties, and though to all appearance help is impossible, yet our business is to hope in God, and it will be found that it is not in vain.”

~ George Muller, quoted in ~
The Roller Coaster of Unemployment: Trusting God for the Ride
by Sarah M. Hupp

He whispers gently.

He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it.

He reminds me of Abraham saying, Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. This is why "it was credited to him as righteousness."

Maybe the extent of my writing career will be the words I write here for my adoring fans (please tell me you're adoring fans, or at least humor me by smiling and nodding politely). He has a perfect plan and I will follow it. But whether or not I "arrive" in the publishing world, my hope has not been in vain.

For in hoping, I'm looking for God, expecting Him to work. I'm living a child-like faith He desires. I'm gaining strength to get through each day. Hope holds me up. Hope moves me forward. God has the power to do anything, but even if He decides not to, hope serves me well, keeping my boat afloat, teaching me reliance on the only One who can make the impossible possible.

Hope grows faith and trust.

For more impressions of this quote, visit Nina at Mama's Little Treasures.

A Picture of Hope

A familiar sight in my house this summer, this stack of stuff fills my heart with hope. It belongs to my son, the music composition major/percussion minor student. What you see are the tools of his trade--his laptop, a cord for his iPod, his bag of drumsticks and a practice pad for drumming.

The cherry on top, the book resting on the practice pad is his Bible. We gave it to him when he left for college nearly two years ago and already it's showing its wear. I smile at the ripped corner and love how it sits amid the things he considers necessities.

If you've read this blog for any length of time you know I worry about Drummer Boy when he's not living here. This picture makes me breathe easier. God's got a hold of his heart.

I Cannot Do This Alone

I ran across this poem by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. May it stir in you as it did me.

I CANNOT DO THIS ALONE

O God, early in the morning I cry to you.
Help me to pray
And to concentrate my thoughts on you;
I cannot do this alone.

In me there is darkness,
But with you there is light;
I am lonely, but you do not leave me;
I am feeble in heart, but with you there is help;
I am restless, but with you there is peace.
In me there is bitterness, but with you there is patience;
I do not understand your ways,
But you know the way for me. . . .

Restore me to liberty,
and enable me to live now
That I may answer before you and before men.
Lord, whatever this day may bring,
Your name be praised.
Amen.

--Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Life is Hard, but God is Good

“Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult – once we truly understand and accept it – then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.”

M. Scott Peck
The Road Less Traveled

I'm not buying this quote. Life is difficult. Period. Knowing it is difficult is no help at all. Knowing life is difficult does not comfort me when I can't sleep worrying about one of my kids or money or how we'll ever get everything done. Knowing life is difficult does not soothe my grief over lost loved ones or stupid comments I made. Knowing life is difficult does not help me deal with a struggling child or looming deadline. It does not provide the wisdom or inspiration necessary to comfort a friend. Knowing life is difficult accomplishes one purpose.

It establishes my need for an all-powerful, all-knowing, merciful, loving God.

Jesus said,"In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

He said, "Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

He tells me, "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Only in my reliance in Jesus and His Word am I soothed and comforted. Only in Him do I find strength and motivation for each day.

Knowing life is difficult means nothing.

Knowing Jesus Christ is everything.

For more interpretations of this quote, visit Nina at Mama's Little Treasures.

The Hope in Dreaming

The graduates walk across the stage, move their tassels and smile, ready to take on the world and reach their goals. Anything is possible. They just need to dream big and go get it.

Or so the theory goes.

I'm curious. How many of you feel like you have reached those big goals and achieved what you hoped? How many wishes are realized? Or did your dream lose its importance as you grew up? Did reality steal it?

Are dreams overrated?

Yet there's something within me that wants to believe the impossible, wants to beat the odds, wants to at least try to achieve something extraordinary. Why? There must be a reason God places these desires in our hearts.

Does the pursuit alone give added meaning and excitement in life? Is attaining our lofty goals as important as working towards them? Is success defined by achievement or faithfulness? Leaving the door open to the possibility of doing something great takes the ordinary out of our reality, gives us hope to press on in difficult times.

It's much like our Christian walk. The hope of something better keeps us going, helps us persevere. The dream of living in heaven with Jesus, experiencing no more heartache and stress, enables us to withstand our time on earth.

Can the same be said for our dreams? Does hoping for and working towards what seems impossible give us more courage for today? Does it infuse us with the child like wonder Jesus encourages? Are these dreams wrapped up with our faith? Does striving for them keep us believing God can do anything?

I may never get a book published. The odds are about the same as me being a finalist on American Idol. The older I get the more unlikely it seems, but I know I'll never get there if I don't work on it and take a shot. In doing so, I am left with a question that makes my insides flutter.

What if it actually happened?

The thought alone can get me out of bed in the morning. It gives me something exciting to think about while folding laundry and puts a spark of joy in an otherwise ordinary day.

To me that joy is worth the extra work, whether the dream is realized or not. The hope of waiting for God to do the impossible keeps my motor going.

And my faith alive.

So go ahead, my friends, dream big and see where God may take you.

Hope for the New Year

We've enjoyed a nice break through the holidays. We've stayed plenty busy, visiting with friends and family, having the kids' friends over, celebrating my mom's retirement, getting my daughter ready for her first big dance.

The change in schedule has brought a little reprieve from the daily grind. Our brief hiatus from the normal routine has made me think less about the stresses that go with it.

Until this morning.

I woke up worried about money and my son finding a job and how in the world I'll accomplish everything I want to.

It solidified my theme word for this year--FOCUS. Only six hours into the new year and already Satan's tried to distract me. Oh brother. 2009 could be tough.

Lucky for me, God doesn't leave me hanging. He reminded me this morning He's got it handled.

Be still and know that I am God...

Psalm 46:10

I try, but sometimes I lose sight and feel like He's not answered the prayers, that He's letting us flounder along.

I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:19-23

God has been good to me, very good. I can let Satan rob my joy or I can persevere in hope, believing God will take care of my family.

And my God will supply all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:19

We can do this, friends. We can press on in confidence.

The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit. Amen.

Philippians 4:23

Happy New Year!

Choosing Hope

I hate change.

Always have.

Every fall as a kid, I'd have dreams the night before school started, worrying about what the new year held.

I hate it when shoes wear out or you have to replace an appliance or your vehicle bites the dust, because what if you don't like the new things as much as the old?

Choosing a new paint color can be exhausting. How do you know it will give the room the right vibe?

I've never lived farther than an hour away from where I grew up.

Deciding on a new activity is a headache. How will it affect my family, my time, my stress level?

I even get a little jittery moving the furniture around.

So it's no surprise to me this election process has been unsettling for many. No matter who was elected, black or white, man or woman, Republican or Democrat, a new leader would be moving into the White House. What will it mean for us?

Anxiety and apprehension about change is nothing new. Change caused the Israelites t0 wander in the wilderness, be taken into captivity and reject the Messiah. But let's not forget it also paved the way for God to display His power (remember the Red Sea, the walls tumbling down, the fiery furnace?), rescued them from slavery, brought them to the Promised Land and provided a way of salvation for ALL men.

Generations of God's people have worried about the future for their children and maintaining their livelihoods just as we do. They faced uncertainty and fear. How did they cope?

They looked to the only thing that never changes, the Maker of heaven and earth, Almighty God.

I the Lord do not change. So you, O descendants of Jacob, are not destroyed.

Malachi 3:6

We are not destroyed either, no where close. We are safe in His control. As much as it goes against my nature, I choose to be thankful for change. Without it I would never have experienced marriage, motherhood or some really great relationships. I would never learn to trust or hope or dream.

As change begins in our country, I'll keep my eyes on God, pray for those in power and look expectantly for His hand. Worrying over the direction our country is headed accomplishes nothing. Instead, I will embrace this change as a time for new possibilities and opportunities to see God in action.

For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

Psalm 100:5

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No Shrinking

“Problems can slow us down temporarily
but they don’t have the ability to stop us.
Only we have that power.”

~Wayne Cordeiro~

She was drug by a horse as a 20-year-old, causing her to nurse a bad hip most of her life, only to have it replaced over fifty years later. She told stories of sitting up all night with her young asthmatic son, before the days of breathing treatments and steroids, just praying he'd keep breathing. She spent many days caring for her dying husband and had a leg amputated in her eighties. Yet she kept plugging away, making the most of life, enjoying her family and baking for them in the early hours of the morning, on one leg, no less.

When I asked her how she did it, how she got through so many tough times, she gave me a confused look, shrugged her shoulders and said, "What else are you going to do?"

Smart woman. The alternative to pressing on is to stop, to quit and do what? Wallow in misery? Waste away in bed? Hide your light?

When life gets hard, I want to escape. I daydream about lying on warm, sandy beaches or being snowed in at a cozy mountain cabin, with plenty of time to sleep and read and enjoy my husband. But running away doesn't remove the problems. Fantasizing only intensifies the longing to be removed from trouble.

God's call to endure is really a gift, making us move past the pain and on to better things. Though it feels like drudgery sometimes, it is His grace, forcing us to look beyond what is before us, telling us to seek the divine, the impossible, the beautiful. When we are able to do so, we build hope. And wonder. And purpose.

You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. For in just a very little while, "He who is coming will come and will not delay. But my righteous one will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him." But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved.

Hebrews 10:36-39

Hope comes from believing, knowing God will get you through, understanding in any moment He has the power to change you or the situation, trusting He knows what is best, believing a miracle could be just around the corner. Do you see the beauty in that? Do you see the childlike faith and wonder? Don't you want it? Don't you want to be wowed? Don't you crave the magic of God's hand? Don't you want to live life with a sparkle in your eye and a gasp at the ready when God shows Himself?

I will not shrink back and be destroyed. I will press on, believing the impossible. I will trudge through the problems, allowing myself a brief rest if necessary, but going forward in the end, knowing God will make all things beautiful in His time.

"What else are you going to do?"

Will you shrink back and be destroyed? Or will you press on and believe, with HOPE?


To read more impressions of this quote, visit Karen at In Love W.I.T.H. Jesus.

Trusting With Hope

There's been a cloud looming over our house all summer.

Our oldest is moving to college. In one week.

Don't ask. Just glance at the time of this post and you'll know how Mom is doing with it.

And yet while I've been stressing, God's been working. He's slowly turning my son into a man.

While I worried about his job situation, God showed him how to conserve the money he has, a skill that will serve him well.

When I wondered whether it was prudent for him to spend so much of July traveling with a Christian singing outreach group and going on a mission trip, God strengthened him spiritually and showed me I would be fine without him around all the time.

He's given him enough conflict to understand the journey may not be easy, yet showed him good friends can make it better.

When I questioned him spending so much time alone in his room, God was helping him detach.

He put in his gut an urge to handle some things himself. (Already I'm getting the, "Mom, I'm fine" speech.)

When he got lost, God showed him how to make do without my help.

Even in the conflicts he's faced this summer, I see God has truly captured his heart.

How can I have room for anything but overwhelming gratitude?

The LORD is righteous in all his ways and loving toward all he has made. The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.
Psalm 145:17-18

Lord, thank You for hearing my prayers concerning my son. I trust You, Lord. You give me hope for his future and security in your plan which far surpasses mine. Make him into Your vision of who he should be. Be near us all in this adjustment. We love You. Give us Your rest and peace.


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Reflecting Truth

She looks in the mirror and sighs. With every exhaled breath her shoulders sag a little more. Her faults are glaring.

The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness.
Matthew 6:22-23

Is she seeing it wrong? Are her eyes bad? Are they preventing her from being who God has created her to be? If all she sees when she looks in the mirror is darkness, is that what comes out? Does wallowing in her weakness snuff out the only light that can make her truly beautiful?

This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth.
1 John 1:5-6

No more walking in the dark. No more.

How can she turn the light on?

She must look for truth. What is TRUE?

The broad hips she hates served her well when bringing new life into the world. The creases in her face and eyes give her character. Each scar and gray hair was earned and represent experience which brings wisdom. Her thick thighs and big feet make her sturdy. Some might think her skinny neck stately and elegant.

But those things don't touch the surface of who she is. There is more to her than what she sees in the mirror, much more. There is compassion behind her eyes. A sincere love for others beats in her chest. She possesses desire and passion for her God. Her mind discerns the truth. This must be her focus.

The woman in the mirror is not the shell appearing in the glass. The woman is God's dearly loved creation, crafted exactly as He planned. If she focuses on the good, on truth, on her value in His eyes, will her body be full of light? Will she then reflect REAL beauty? Is that what it takes to impact her world?



Thank You, Lord, for Truth.

And one more thing: If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, what are you beholding and how is it holding you back?

Press on in truth, my friends.


For more Thankful Thursday posts, visit Sting My Heart.

A Mom's Glimmer of Hope

Attila, my daughter walked into the kitchen, grabbed her "little" brother (who's actually a smidge taller than she) in a bear hug and said, "Hello, bro. How are ya doing?"

He looked over her shoulder at me while she held on tight, lifted his eyebrows and mouthed, "awkward."

But he didn't try to squirm out of it either.

"Good," he replied, "How are you?"

"Good." They shifted from foot to foot in this little huggy thing for a while.

And my heart smiled.



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No Match for Hope

The world says, "You can't do it." Hope says, "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."

The world says, "You are nothing." Hope says, "You are holy and dearly loved."

The world says, "You're not powerful enough, pretty enough, smart enough, rich enough, sexy enough." Hope says, "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."

The world says, "There is no way." Hope says, "I am the way and the truth and the life."

The world says, "You are simple and ignorant and foolish." Hope says, "Blessed are you when people insult you because of me. Great is your reward in heaven."

The world says, "Life is meaningless." Hope says, "I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

The world says, "A loving God would never let bad things happen." Hope says, "God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

The world says, "No one cares." Hope says, "I have loved you with an everlasting love and "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

The world says, "You don't matter." Hope says, "I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and have not rejected you."

The world says, "You're on your own. You have to look out for yourself. No one's going to do it for you." Hope says, "The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you."

I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope; Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:19-23

Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.
Psalm 34:8

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