Thursday, May 22, 2008

Tick, tick, tick. . .

School got out yesterday and I'm already stressing. How am I going to keep these kids busy all summer and still be able to work on some personal goals?

There never seems to be enough time. I feel like I'm continually accounting for my minutes as a miser counts his coins. And I don't even have a job--I don't have time for one!

But God tells me, "There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven" (Ecclesiastes 3:1) He says, "...the wise heart will know the proper time and procedure." (Ecclesiastes 8:5)

I need some major wisdom then, Lord, for I'm spinning my wheels most days.

On Sunday our pastor talked about God wanting us to have order in our lives. Amen, brother, I'm all for that. He quoted Proverbs 24:27, "Finish your outdoor work and get your fields ready; after that, build your house." See, definite order in how to approach your work. But what are my fields and what is my house? Help! I want order, but I don't know how to establish it.

I have things I want to get done, things I feel called to do, things I feel compelled to do, but I have to be flexible enough for someone to drop by unannounced and visit a while. I have to spend time with people I love. I have to maintain and develop relationships. People are always first for me. They make life fun and worthwhile. So you think people are my fields? Maybe. Then my house would be. . . ?

There is never a shortage of things I COULD do, but what SHOULD I do? I analyze the use of every minute and try to organize my time, but even then I wonder if the time spent thinking about it actually wastes the precious time. OY! You see how I go in circles over this? Is anyone else feeling dizzy right now?

I've been praying a lot about it this week and God has shown me three verses.
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.
Psalm 32:8
Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it.
Isaiah 30:21
...I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.
Isaiah 48:17
He promises over and over He'll direct me and I'm ashamed I haven't seen my problem until now.

Yet again, I'm having trouble trusting God.

Just as He asks me to trust Him with my money or my children, He asks me to trust Him with my time. I am faced with a choice. Will I worry about how to spend my days and what I need to accomplish or will I start each morning in His presence and then make a plan? Will I accept disruptions in my schedule as divine and enjoy them? Will I trust that whatever happens in a day is no mistake? Can I determine not to worry about the things on my list that don't get finished and purpose to tackle them tomorrow? Can I hand Him my future and say, "Thy will be done"?

Lord, I don't want to waste a minute of the precious gift of time. Help me trust You to order my days. Give me wisdom. Speak to me. Direct me. I thank You that even time is in Your hands.

And now, if you'll excuse me, I feel God directing me to my kitchen floor. As my dear friend, Amanda, would say, "It's disgusting." I hear ya, Lord.

Be sure to visit Iris for more Thankful Thursday posts.


Susan said...

Hey Tami,

I hear you alright, I've expressed these feelings way too many times in my life!

It's funny because when I had to drop everything and leave my family for 3 months, (go to St. Jude with Jordan for treatment), I remembered thinking, all of this will work it self out, I want my child to get well.

(I'm not saying this to make you feel bad, I've already FORGOT many lessons learned during that time!!)

I do remember that God's peace and grace carried us all, and my focus was on HIM first.

Life can be so crazy. Someone once recently said, we need to get rid of the spirit of "hurry and worry".

I shouted AMEN!!

Sorry for rambling, sending some cyber hugs your way!

Brenda said...

I think finding the right balance between people and household duties is very hard. Great words of wisdom Tami.

Denise said...

Sending you hugs and prayers.

e-Mom said...

I hear you! Soooo much to do. We have a wedding right around the corner.... :~D

Melanie said...

This is so true! I struggle with the "time issue" almost daily, but God always does work it out. I just first have to remember to turn it over to him.

Have a great weekend!

Living Beyond said...

Oh yes I'm in on this one too, but I just love the verses that spoke to you and I have printed them out - because truthfully - it's the only way to make every minute count.


Tiffany Stuart said...

My floors aren't any better. :)

I seem to be have to learn that same trust lesson over and over. Thanks for another reminder to let go and look for God's lead.

Anonymous said...

One thought that struck me as I read your post today, was
"things I want to accomplish"....I have been the wife of a dairy farmer ( and I helped milk all those cows every day), had six children, homeschooled, ran errands for the farm, did all the yardwork, ran errands for the farm, did everything I could to help my hubby, drove a tractor, ran errands....I remember never knowing for sure what the day held. I just learned to hold my time loosely in my hand, and just to be available for the next thing. I had a couple things each day that occurred at the same time, (big meal at 12:30, milk cows starting at 4:30) and everything fell into place around that. It was hectic, but God knew best for me how to be the most effective to my family. He will do the same for you....but truly, there are times when there is just no time for the things you, as a mom, really want to do, and you just trust God that, someday, those things might come your way.
Blessings as you work this out!!

Cahleen 何凱琳 said...

Hi Tami! You commented on one of my posts awhile ago and I never got a chance to respond. Just wanted to lwt you know that your words are a blessing to me. Keep doing what you're doing!