The heaviness I feel for my brother.
He's a good guy who makes choices I don't understand. He muddles along in life, waiting for nice things to come his way that never seem to arrive. He and I have a hard time communicating, yet underlying the awkward silences and surface level chit-chat is a desire on both sides to be connected. Why can't we get there?
Every time I talk with him, I'm aware of his hopelessness. My heart hurts for him and I don't know what to say or how to help.
He needs grace.
We are very much alike, he and I, in temperament, in sensitivity, in how we view our place in life. I have hope and direction, peace and confidence, only because of one thing.
Were it not for grace,
I can tell you where I'd be
wand'ring down some pointless road to nowhere
with my salvation up to me.
I know how that would go,
the battles I would face;
forever running, but losing the race,
were it not for grace.
"Were It Not for Grace"
Words by Phill McHugh
Because of His grace, because my Jesus looked down and said, "You're worth it. I will suffer on that cross to spare you," I know there is so much more.
I love my brother.
More than he knows.
I want him to be rescued as I was, to know the reality he wakes up to is not all there is, to find meaning and purpose in life. I want him to understand a life of following God is not about giving up everything, but about gaining so much more. I want him to know there is a way to sleep peacefully at night and wake up excited at the possibility in a new day. But I can't explain it. I can't make him understand. I can only say one thing.
There is more.
On this Good Friday I think of Jesus hanging on that cross, displaying His love to people who do not understand. And I pray He opens my brother's eyes. For isn't that the message of Easter? Isn't that the good news?
"I have come that they may have life," Jesus said, "and have it to the full." He lives so we can really live too.
I want my brother to really live, to believe there is more, to hope for big dreams, to experience all God has for him, not only in eternity, but also on this earth.
There is so much more.
He weighs heavy on my heart.
Lord, reach for him. Show him Your grace. Give him more.