Friday, February 18, 2011

7 Quick Takes (Volume 121)


1) People tell me I am transparent. I've always thought it a good trait until I had this conversation with Drama Queen.

Drama Queen: It's LSD month at youth group.

Me: Love, Sex and Dating?

Drama Queen: Yeah.

Me: Oooh, that's my favorite month of youth group.

Drama Queen: I'm sure it is.

Me: Why do you say it like that?

Drama Queen: Oh please, Mom. I know how you feel about sex.

Me: What?! How can you possibly know that?

Drama Queen: You can tell. Besides, we've talked about it. You've said things.

Yikes. What kind of sex vibe am I giving off?

2) My friend had big news about Valentine's Day. Much to her delight, her husband planned a romantic date full of surprises.

"He's been Kevin-ized," she said.

Husbands, let the revolution begin! Find out how very little it takes to romance your wives. You too can be Kevin-ized!

3) And speaking of my man, he is still going strong . We are on week seven and he hasn't let up. (I don't think it has anything to do with the whole blogosphere holding him accountable now.) As another of my friends put it, "Kevin is a rock star!"

Amen sister! But I'm thinking he's getting something out of this too. The other day he wrapped me up in his arms and said, "I kind of like this romance thing."

"Yeah?" his contented wife murmured.

"Yeah. I like what it does to you. You're all warm and fuzzy. I like it."

Husbands, are you hearing this?! Give an ounce of effort and your wives will turn to jello, fulfilling your every desire.

4) Case in point: Valentine's Day. We were stuck going to parent-teacher conferences so celebrating that evening was out. Because my husband has been Mr. Wonderful, I thought he deserved a little something too, so I arranged a surprise lunch rendezvous. Let's just say we had such a good time my husband was late getting back to work.

Hmmm . . .is this the kind of stuff Drama Queen was referring to?

5) And now something from the files of you-don't-see-this-everyday.


We've been driving this truck around town for at least two weeks loaded down with all this junk from our latest remodeling projects. I feel like a total hick when I park this puppy in any business parking lot. One day last week I was backing out and it killed while I was half in and half out of a stall, then wouldn't start again! Talk about embarrassing!

I felt like I needed to apologize as I drove the babysitter to Bible study the other day.

"Sorry you have to ride in the Hillbilly mobile," I said.

"It's no big deal," she said, completely unfazed, "I'm from Arkansas. Everybody's truck looks like that there."

Ha! Remember she said it, not me! But here's what really puts this in the you-don't-see-this-everyday file.


How many rednecks keep Rachmaninoff and Debussy in their front seat?!

6) You know it's coming. Time for my quest-to-never-be-an-episode-of-Hoarders update:

I got the mother-of-all file cabinets cleaned out this week. YES! What once fit in two and a half drawers, now fits easily into one and a half, and I was able to put my personal files in the now spacious bottom drawer.

I also cleared the closet in Drama Queen's old bedroom which is becoming a FANTASTIC office. Love it, love it, LOVE IT!! Splendiferous writing is sure to flow from this sacred chamber.

(Now if only I could find the time to finish the painting job so I can show you pictures!)

7) I fear my kids' spouses will talk bad about me someday when they realize my kids aren't great vegetable eaters. I try, really I do. I always serve it and make them take a little. Last night Ladies Man felt it necessary to make his opinion known.

Ladies Man: Broccoli is sick. Yuck.

Me (playing June Cleaver): Broccoli is one of the healthiest foods there is.

Ladies Man (unimpressed): Broccoli punches happiness in the face.

Oh brother. Watch out Drama Queen. Someone's gunning for your title.

That's all she wrote today, friends. Tune into more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.

6 comments:

Kassie @ Secret Vatican Spy said...

OH my goodness. Your son sounds like one of my brothers. He is the. . .father? of all one-liners. I just found your blog via the 7 Quick Takes link-up and had to see what Kevin-ized meant. Too cool! I'm unmarried, but things like that still make me happy on the inside! Have a great weekend.

Kathleen@so much to say said...

#7: HAHAHAHAHA!

Thumbs up for Rachmaninoff and Malotte int he front seat of the truck!

Christine said...

You are hysterical! And I hope you're giving off a passionate-our-love-is-like-a-fire-and-I-like-it-that-way sex vibe! ;)

And no, I've never seen a redneck with Rachmaninoff on the front seat. You're awesome. :)

Tami said...

Kassie--Our Ladies Man is 15 like your brother. He's always got some silly comment!

Kathleen--Somehow I knew you'd appreciate the humor of our truck's front seat!

Christine--I certainly hope that's the vibe I'm giving off! Though our kids tease us and give plenty of eye rolls, I often glimpse a little smile. It's my personal opinion that knowing their parents have a good sex life makes them feel more secure in our home. "Mom and Dad won't ever get a divorce. They like sex too much!" Ha!

dianne said...

As usual, you make me laugh. Out loud. I finally decided to play along for once - no false hopes of ever being this funny though!

Unknown said...

Broccoli punches happiness in the face. hahahaha ohhhhh I'm going to have to use this for something else. I grew out of my hatred for broccoli. This could be a dangerous experiment, but what if you made them eat nothing but junk food for a week? I'm not a mom, you might be on the floor already, in horror. All I know is when I get into eating bad habits, after one week, I'm ready to be a vegetarian vegan.