Tuesday, April 21, 2009

My Irrational Fear

I spend a lot of time on my computer every week and I've started to worry a bit.

What if my butt gets bigger?

I'm not kidding. Think about it. Sitting for hours at a time it's bound to start spreading, isn't it? When God calls you to a work, he doesn't automatically remove the occupational hazards, does He? Dentists probably get bit every once in a while. Firefighters risk their lives every time they go out on a call. Hairdressers cut themselves on sharp scissors. Coal miners never come out of a mine clean. Mechanics live with greasy fingers. Singers get hoarse after a long tour. Young mothers are consistently bleary eyed. Politicians get windy. Celebrities gain stalkers. Even the most skilled carpenter hammers their thumb now and then.

Do aspiring writers get big butts?

I exercise regularly, but an hour several times a week can't outweigh many hours on my tushy, can it?

This is not good.

Got any suggestions? I know of an author who situated her desk so she could sit on one of those big exercise balls as she typed away. I'm not sure I have the coordination for typing and balancing at the same time. I once broke my wrist rolling a tire down my driveway.

Is it self-centered to pray your backside doesn't grow?


Angie said...

I don't think of that as self-centered! BUT I laughed...outloud...and it felt good.

Sorry I have'nt visited in a couple of weeks---or more! I have been totally BOGGED DOWN! ---but I'm up and breathing again...:) for now.

THIS was just what I needed!

Love you!

Linda said...

Maybe when we use our heads thinking so much about what to write they will get bigger too and balance the bottom end. Then we can look like dumbells.

I watched a news story once, where an office placed all computers on treadmills so people worked while walking very slowly. They all lost weight and productivity stayed good.

Dr. Pfizer said...

Have you ever been properly diagnosed with depression/anxiety disorder? You should see a doc.

e-Mom said...

Lol, Tami! The first two years I blogged, by backside DID grow. I've since lost the weight (and my DH is smiling) by eating less. :~D

Anonymous said...

It just came to me, you should request funds for a government study. Who knows how harmful this could be? Not only is our biosphere being damaged from our computer and cellphone, we know have the concern of big butts!!! All in fun,Tami, good to know you have a human side!

kpjara said...

We have one of those large balls in our living room. I got it for the husband for Christmas to help his aching back. He got on it once and we nearly laughed ourselves silly! It was hilarious to watch him try to manage that huge ball. Now it sits in the living room waiting for some poor kid to visit and roll around.

I think between exercise and prayer...you should be covered.

Dianne said...

This made me laugh out loud. i have seriously been wondering about this, finding myself sitting for longer and longer periods at work! You are too funny.

Anonymous said...

LOL! hahahaha
indeed!! well I don' think my butt can grow any bigger than it is.. but I did pray for sliming down when I wa s a teen...
anyway I sometimes do Leslie Sansone side desk walk, to keep focused and to do some movement, it's fun and free (youtube: 2 or 3 minutes walk)and I feel better after it..