Food that Flopped (And How We Laughed About it Later)

I tried to be thrifty.

There was nothing much in the house for dinner, but determined not to spend any more money that week I decided to wing it with what I had. I found a beef stroganoff mix but no beef, so I improvised with sausage thinking it might add a little zing. Don't try this at home, people. Ew.

It smelled a little weird, but so does Chinese food, right? It only took a few bites to make my eyes water. My husband politely ate some and watched me closely.

"This is horrible," I said, bursting into tears.

And he laughed. He LAUGHED!

Then he gave me a hug, kissed my cheek and asked, "What do you want from Burger King?"

Another time I tried to be healthy.

Wanting to expose my children to a bigger variety of vegetables, I cooked brussel sprouts for dinner. I thought they might think the little buggers were cute. My four-year-old took a bite, looked at his plate and asked, "Do we have to eat this again?" Before I had a chance to answer my husband looked me straight in the eye and said, "No. No we don't."

I tried to be exciting.

We received a wok as a wedding gift and I was anxious to test it out. Though my husband worried about the smoke coming from it, I assured him it was okay. The instructions said it had to be seasoned. The smoke was only part of the seasoning process. But when the smoke instantaneously burst into a ball of fire, I had to admit he was right.

I guess I didn't get the protective plastic coating scrubbed off before I fired it up.

We were able to douse the flames without help from the fire department, but it took a while to clear the smoke out of our apartment. The wok wasn't even ruined, but every time I took it out to use it, my husband teased me, so the maiden fiery voyage became its last trip in our house.

You know that adage, "Sex begins in the kitchen?" We started a fire in ours!

Thankfully I've been blessed with a man who doesn't care too much about the food served. He's happy with a hot dog if it keeps me sane. Now that's not to say I don't cook his favorites from time to time. I'm no dummy. I know the other phrase--"The way to a man's heart is through his stomach."

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Happy Monday, friends!