I wouldn't tell him, "I love you."
You could say I was cautious. It took a few months before I even thought of him as my boyfriend. We were just two friends enjoying each other's company, sharing common interests and deep conversations and giggling until the wee hours of the morning. But then he started taking my hand. We strolled through campus dreaming together. He laughed at my jokes and listened intently. This guy was different. I knew something was happening, yet played it safe, not revealing the flutters inside. The first time he kissed me I almost fell down the stairs. We were connected and I definitely had feelings for him, but I wouldn't let myself say the precious words. Uttering "I love you" was akin to saying, "I want to marry you." I couldn't do it until I thought marriage a possibility.
"I love you" is sacred.
In God's marvelous providence, He put Kevin in His service and took him away for nearly a year. My reaction to the separation surprised me. I had the hardest time living without the guy! And I never saw it coming. One day I was thinking I would miss him, but could handle the year just fine and the next I was a moping, weepy, miserable mess. God knew I wouldn't consider myself in love without seeing how life without him would be. It only took a few months to realize the obvious.
We didn't let ourselves go to "I love you" until we knew we were headed somewhere permanent. Others might find our reservation prudish, but because we guarded our hearts BEFORE we were together, no other man (besides relatives) has heard those words from my mouth nor has any woman heard them from his. We saved it (among other things!) only for each other.
"I love you" signifies commitment.
Once the magic words came out, we were done for, hitched, connected for life. My husband has never given me reason to doubt and teaches me consistently what unconditional love is. When we finally said "I love you," it held great meaning, going far beyond the sentiment "I really really like you." In the same way as Horton the elephant, "I love you" stated, "I meant what I said and I said what I meant. I will be faithful one hundred percent."
Be sure to join our lovely host e-Mom at Chrysalis for more marriage stories.
9 comments:
Let others think it's prudish to reserve the "I Love You" for the realization that this is permanent! That phrase is something that's thrown around far too easily these days! God knows the deepest desires of our heart and it's JUST LIKE HIM to imprint us in such a way there's no mistaking HIS fingerprint upon us!! I regret that Dave wasn't my first (in everything) but I am forever grateful that he is my last! Thanks for sharing your perspective on the commitment in marriage!
Hugs,
Connie
Yes, “I love you” is sacred. Isn’t it wonderful how we understand that even without having to be told that? Thanks for sharing your beautiful story of love and commitment.
You shared this so beautifully and it fits so perfectly with this month's theme. Thanks for sharing.
Such a lovely story.
Tami,
I respect every ounce of your reservation of those special words. What a precious story! And I love thinking back to the chill bumps of that first kiss...the one when you knew that every prayer that you ever prayed had been answered!
Much love
jen
Beautiful, Tami.
I'm with you on "I love you." Gals, especially get their hearts broken when they hear and believe those words too early in a relationship. A good bit of advice I'm sure you're teaching your kids, especially your sons.
Thanks for joining us for Marriage Monday today, as always.
(((Hugs!)) e-Mom ღ
Beautiful post! I absolutely remember the first time I said "I love you" to German, and the unbearable twenty hour wait before he said the words as well. They were absolutely my commitment to him and his to me. Sacred words, and they still are today. Thank you for a wonderful thought-provoking post!
You captured my heart on this post. I see on Facebook so many dating teens who fling "I love you" on everything they say and I know it isn't the same love you shared here.
Thank you for this post.
Amazing! thank you so much for sharing your story!! I plan on telling this to my 17 year old. (she doesn't date and has taken a purity pledge altho we are not opposed to dating...but we have had LONG talks about just casually saying "I Love You"!) this was excellent!!
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