To Flirt or Not to Flirt

My youngest is growing up. She's catching the playful banter and looks my husband and I give each other. Case in point:

Miss Innocent One: It's embarrassing when you guys flirt in public. I just want to say, "Hello, I'm right here!"

Me: What are you talking about?

Miss Innocent One: Remember when you were going to the concession stand and asked Dad what he wanted?

Me: Yeah. So?

Miss Innocent One: And he said, "You know what I like." EW!

I didn't break it to her, but I won't quit flirting with my husband to satisfy her adolescent angst. I mean, we parents have to use everything we've got to keep those teenagers grossed out, right? It's one last little bit of power we can wield over them. As long as I can repulse them, they'll know their place. That's why later I decided to get a bigger bang out of that buck and told Drama Queen about it. You may as well sicken as many children as you can with one punch.

Me: Miss Innocent One told me it's embarrassing when Dad and I flirt in public.

Drama Queen: It's good when your parents flirt, Miss Innocent One.

What?! She's agreeing with me? Quick, someone record this moment. It may never happen again!

Me (going with it): Yeah. See?

Drama Queen: Well, it can either be cute or disgusting.

Me: Which are we?

Drama Queen: I don't want to answer that question. It's too weird to say you're cute . . . but you're not disgusting.

Ha. Victory!

Me: It's my personal opinion that kids actually like it when their parents flirt because then they know their marriage is secure.

Drama Queen: Whatever.

I should have quit while I was ahead. Less is more, people. Less is more. But I say go for it, parents. Go ahead and flirt. Flirt like the wind. Flirt like there's no tomorrow. Enjoy your marriage and make those teenagers shudder. Secretly they're thinking it's pretty cool, even if they're disgusted in the moment.