People tell me, "You adore your husband" or "It's so easy for you to talk him up" or "You are very devoted to him."
To which I get a look of consternation and say, "Yeah . . ."
They tell me it's unusual.
Which makes me wonder if I need to clarify a few things. Please don't miss the point in me sharing my appreciation of my husband. I'm not trying impress anyone or give the idea we live an idyllic life. We annoy each other plenty. We don't see eye to eye on everything. We've had tough times. There are things about him I don't get that drive me crazy.
But if I focus on the bad, what comes from that? When I talk about his pleasing features, about the qualities in him that make me swoon, do I cement the good in my head? When I write it down for all the world to see, do I hold myself accountable to give him credit? Can I enhance our marriage by dwelling on the noble, the admirable? If I continually look for the best, will he do the same? Do we start this beautiful, blessed cycle of admiration when we rest on the good and believe the best?
It's true I adore my husband, but is it because he's so wonderful, or because I strive to see the wonderful in him? Do I get giddy over him because I purpose to see his best, to see what he's trying to be?
He is pretty terrific, but not perfect and MERCY!, you should see what a basketcase his wife is! If he can overlook my glaring deficiencies, shouldn't I do the same? If we practice forgiving and finding traits we are truly thankful for, can we deepen our esteem for each other?
Can you find loving feelings by doing the same?