Friday, March 13, 2009

True Love Risks Offending

She is my dear, dear friend, my trustworthy, like-minded, smart, deep-thinking, wise friend.

So when she sat across the table from me and said, "You're wrong," it nearly took my breath away.

She has challenged my thinking many times, but never to this level of disagreement. What could this mean? Would she think less of me now? Was this difference of opinion going to affect our relationship? I didn't like the feeling.

But if she truly felt I was wrong and said nothing, wouldn't that be worse? If she perceived my thinking as going down the wrong path, but kept quiet, could I call her reliable or faithful? If she kept her mouth shut, would she be my friend?

She took the hard route, the risky, selfless way.

She loved me.

Better is open rebuke than hidden love.

Proverbs 27:5



7 comments:

Betsy Markman said...

You and your friend are both very wise. You are a gift to each other.

Lisa said...

Here you are again, with the wise words. Our son is having "teen dating" issues. This very one. Tough to do when you are 17 and learning about relationships. I was talking with him when I read your quick takes. I highlighted the first for him. He nodded in agreement. I am printing this for him to read and share with his friend. I really couldn't have explained it better. Thanks for being there, my friend.

Mary Moss said...

What a blessing you are to each other. The type of friendship that takes that kind of risk is rare indeed!

Brenda said...

Those kinds of friends are not easy to find! you are blessed!

e-Mom said...

So how did you respond to your precious friend's directness? What did you say? Do you agree with her now? :~D

Tami Boesiger said...

Leave it to you, e-Mom, to want the rest of the story!

I have to admit I was taken aback at first, but really thought hard on what she was saying. We were in the middle of a Bible study group and I must not have been the only one who was feeling tense because after a while someone asked, "Tami, I've got to know what you're thinking!"

"I'm looking at a woman I greatly respect and thinking through what she's saying, wondering if I've been wrong on this," I said and meant every word of it. I'm not afraid to admit I don't know it all.

Immediately after Bible study was over, my friend and I were in the hall hugging and reassuring one another. We have talked about it a few times since and both have said the other has valid points we have considered throughout the week.

I'm not sure what I think is correct on the particular topic we were discussing (e-Mom, you might find it interesting we were discussing divorce), but you better believe I've mulled it over lots. She opened my eyes to a perspective I can't ignore.

My friend is a high class act. This ended up being a really good thing, bringing us even closer. I want all the readers to understand I know how blessed I am to have her.

hljourney said...

Tami,
How wonderful it is to have such a blessing to help each other grow in friendship and having a closer relationship with God! I have a friend like this - - - how true it is the challenges friends like these bring us too... through God's leading them! What a friend, what a friend - truly a blessing!
Will be sharing this one! Thanks for your thoughts, sharing, and understanding!

HL