A girl who always follows the rules. My rebellious phase lasted maybe two months. I get paranoid if someone looks at me funny. I do what I can to keep everyone happy. My conversion story is lackluster. I didn't have to be cleansed from any addiction or horrible past. This girl who did what she was supposed to do, just started living by God's rules one day.
And yet there are days I wonder if following the rules is worth it. Bad stuff still happens to good girls and those they love. God doesn't always answer prayers the way I'd like. There is no perfect life. And when the hard stuff hits, I feel my efforts to be good have been overlooked by God. Why bother? Does it matter? Is there really protection in living His way?
The truth is, when I'm scared or worried or feeling like nothing matters, I've forgotten the goodness of God in my past. I'm listening to Satan's whispers saying, "this can't possibly work out right" and "what's the point of following a God who doesn't reward your faithfulness" and "it doesn't matter what you do when tragedy and trauma hit everyone."
“When the truth doesn’t feel true is when we begin to believe it isn’t. Satan’ biggest, most effective weapon against good girls may not be lust or slander or adultery or addiction. It is forgetfulness.”
Grace for the Good Girl: Letting Go of the Try-Hard Life
The moment I entertain these thoughts, Satan's sucked me in. I may not be sleeping with my neighbor or doing drugs or cheating on my taxes, but believing those lies is just as harmful.
Not acknowledging God's faithfulness and goodness in the past blasts away at my faith every bit as much, if not MORE, than any other sin I avoid.
I need to remember Who He is and what He's done. When I don't, I leave myself vulnerable for Satan's attack.
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