Rather than turn from loneliness, what if we turned toward it? Could it be that loneliness is not a curse but a gift? A gift from God?
Traveling Light: The Promise of Psalm 23
I am the mother of four children, three teenagers and a tweener who is a social butterfly. My mom stayed with them this weekend and said our house is like grand-central station with kids coming and going (some mine, some not). At my house, there's always a lot of activity, a lot of noise, a lot of people. How could I possibly get lonely?
Yet there are days I feel lost in the shuffle I call my life, days when the things I want to concentrate on take a back seat to the physical, social and transportational needs of my family. There are days I feel pulled to the limit and then asked for more, days when my only time alone is at 5:AM, days when one more "Mom, can I. . .?" will send me over the edge (or at least into another room alone to collect myself.).
I feel forgotten, used, unseen. And alone.
I've spent many moments feeling stretched too far, crying in my bathroom, asking God what the point of it all is, asking Him, "What am I supposed to do with this?" Often I've prayed for Him to have a friend stop by, or give me a call, or send an e-mail to encourage my drooping spirit, but rarely does it happen. He lets me have my little weep fest, then says to get up and take another crack at it. So I take a deep breath and go back in.
I have often wondered why he doesn't send a little boost my way. Would it be so terrible to have someone think of me? (Ouch, I'm embarrassed to even type that. See how much work God needs to do?) But I've figured it out. A person having a pity party doesn't learn to deal with life by having more attention drawn to herself. In sending no one, God's blessing me by teaching me perseverance, toughening me up, making me stronger.
He's showing me He is enough.
Truly that is a gift. If I can learn to live by that motto, nothing can keep me down. Friends will not always be there. My own husband cannot always be there, but God. . .God will ALWAYS be there.
Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.
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