Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Steps to Connection: Humility

You know that awkward feeling you have when you see someone you recognize from somewhere, but you can't remember where and their name is absent from your consciousness? Or some person who doesn't look at all familiar calls you by name and you know there's an expectation attached you'll never meet? If you're like me you're tempted to dodge them and the embarrassment, but the unpleasantness returns every time you run into them.

There's only one thing to do. Swallow your pride and admit the truth.

It happened to me once as I was walking the track early one morning, my head lost in who knows what kind of thought, when suddenly a lady behind me said, "I enjoyed your song in church yesterday." I turned to see a woman I swear I had never seen before.

"You were in my church yesterday?" I asked.

"Well, yes, I've been going there for two years now."

Yeah. Ouch.

Well, what's a person to do? There was no place to hide. It was me and her and empty, uneasy silence, so I owned up to it.

"I'm sorry. I don't think I've ever met you," I said. Proper introductions were given and instantly I had one less person to avoid. Whew.

Because my husband is our worship pastor and I am up front on Sunday mornings, these kinds of things happen to me often. There are a lot of people in church who know who I am, but I have never met, people who look at me knowingly and leave me feeling completely inept. But once I admit to my lack of knowledge or memory, once I let myself lose face, once I humble myself, I can move past the awkwardness.

If we truly desire to be connected to others, it will require us to swallow our pride at times. But it's worth it because then we won't feel uncomfortable around people. We won't give the impression we're better than others by not speaking to them (Sadly, I think I've been guilty of this too many times.). When I'm humble enough to reveal my inadequacies, it opens the door to relationships.

You can do it too. Really, you can. Give it a shot. Make a connection by being humble.



More Steps to Connection:
Understand All Have Insecurities
Vulnerability
Time
Availability
Expectations
Be Yourself
Take a Risk
Assume the Best
Sacrifice

5 comments:

e-Mom said...

Nice piece Tami. It seems to me that women are naturally more humble than men... but not always!

It's interesting to hear more about your life as a worship pastor's wife. :~D

Susan said...

Thanks for being humble and sharing this story with us.

I've learned from your experience.

As always, your posts challenge me♥

Linda said...

I've been there fumbling for a name to go with a face. Thanks for pointing out the positive of being humble.

Brenda said...

I am terrible with names. This happens to me often. I just smile and say "Hi. How are you?" I can carry on a conversation quite awhile....not very humble I guess. The kids will say "Who was that?" and I have to say "I have no idea."

Cahleen Hudson said...

This happens to me all the time! I often run into my old students from years past, but unless I was particularly close to that student I usually can't remember them. I've taught hundreds of people over the past three years, and a lot of them have the same names. I usually only teach them for a few months, and then the next batch comes in. I feel so bad, but I can't keep up with all those people! I know humility would be a good thing in that situation. I'm just so worried I'll hurt their feelings!