Morning Fun

My husband (most definitely NOT a morning person) shuffles into the kitchen at the same time my daughter exits.

"She didn't want any of my beautiful eggs. Look at 'em," I say, bringing the pan closer, "Aren't they beautiful?"

He drags his not-yet-awake body my way, wraps his arms around my waist and mumbles, "not as beautiful as you."

Yeah. He can be a suck-up, but I'm no fool. I'll take it and play along. "Ooh, keep talking."

He buries his sleepy eyes in my neck and admits, "That's all I got."

And I laugh. You gotta love a guy who keeps it real.

Shining For Him

It is quieter than normal in her living room. Though her smile normally lights up a room, today it is absent. Instead there are tears and confusion and deep, deep thought. She says something then stares at the floor. I hate to break the quiet and something in me tells me to wait, so I do. More pain comes gushing out and then more silence. The pattern continues and soon I find myself in wonder. My beautiful, beautiful friend is processing past hurt and emotions she has tried to avoid, simply because God says it is time.

He tells her, "Let it out, deal with it, feel it." While it cuts to her core, she decides she must because as she puts it, "I feel worse, but I know it's going to be better." Amid the sorrow there is hope. And I see the desire in her to know God more, to experience the freedom only He can give.

She knows it won't be fun. She's sure He'll ask her to do things she doesn't want to, but she'll do them. She's determined to follow Him wherever He leads. She has to. Her heart truly belongs to Him.

“Still, accepting God’s existence is one thing; honoring his command is another matter entirely, especially if we’re required to go back when we’d rather go forward.”

~Liz Curtis Higgs

And here I am, sitting on her couch, watching God do His thing, seeing her respond with humility and trust. She has never been more beautiful. My already high esteem jumps up considerably and I thank God I know this woman who challenges me to be better. God's touch is evident. I am so proud of her.

I can't help but wonder if I have that courage. Would I be willing to take a step back for God? Could I walk through pain only because God said it was necessary? I'd like to think I would, but just in case, I'll keep hanging with this girl. She's sure to lead the way.


For more impressions on this week's quote, visit Miriam Pauline's Monologue.

Mesmerized

I can hardly take it.

Really.

God is just too much.

The last two days have brought me up close and personal with His Spirit at work in people I love. Unexpected glimpses of Him have left me speechless. Wow.

Wow.

I'm completely jazzed and amazed and consumed with reflective thoughts. I find myself staring into space thinking. I linger in a chair, gazing out the window, lost in my head. (To my IRL friends--I know what you're thinking. Trust me. It's worse than usual.) I can't sleep, recalling what I've seen. And I'm not getting squat done at my house!

But you know what? I really don't care. I don't care that my kitchen's a mess and I only got two loads of clothes washed today. I have no guilt for spending a fortune on lunch or slapping together nachos for dinner. It doesn't matter that I need to lose a little weight or have a zit forming on my chin. Having a title or amazing credits to my name means nothing.

None of it matters because I've seen God!

I've had a front row seat to His transforming power. I know, I know my Redeemer lives. My body is actually tingly with excitement.

Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure.
Psalm 16:9
Wow.

He is real. He is living. He is working.

You know I have to sing again, right?

How can I keep from singing Your praise?
How can I ever say enough?
How amazing is Your love.
How can I keep from shouting Your name?
I know I am loved by the King
and it makes my heart want to sing.

Keep doing Your thing, God. Wow.

Watching the Spirit Move

God

is

working.

All around us.

Every day.

I see Him in the resolve I never knew existed in my grown son. He shines in the courage, faithfulness and trust of my dear mother-in-law. I almost hold my breath as He draws near to a woman willing to feel the pain of her past because her heart wants more of Him.

And I am in awe. He redeems tears. He holds hearts tenderly. He speaks softly. He turns meager human effort into the supernatural.

I am sucked in. I want to shake everyone around me and say, "Do you see it? Do you feel it? Can you believe it?" I can't look away. My eyes mist, yet a smile won't leave my face. I am mesmerized by His presence and my heart is pierced with one thought.

Who am I, that I get to sit so close?

Everything in me wants to sing,

There is none like You.
No one else can touch my heart like You do.
I could search for all eternity long and find
there is none like You.

I see You, Lord, and I am moved.


Find more thankful hearts at Sting My Heart.

Why Romance Matters

Want this button?

When we were dating, we'd take long walks under starry skies, hand in hand, discussing our future and our dreams. We'd stay up until 3:AM, soft music playing in the background, talking about where God was taking us. We got married and I'd surprise him with special romantic dinners in our teeny apartment, getting so gussied up, dinner would inevitably get cold (wink, wink).

And then life kicked into gear. Jobs required more of our time. We added kids. And activities. And stress.

And now romance is not so easily attained. It requires effort. It has to be thought about and planned. While sometimes it's one more thing to do (please, no more!), the benefits always outweigh the hassle. Society jokes that romance ends with marriage, but I think God designed marriage to include romance for very specific reasons.

Romance identifies you as belonging to each other.

Maybe because I spent so many high school and wedding dances watching everybody else have a good time, I find dancing very romantic. It's you and him on the dance floor surrounded by people, yet you only have eyes for each other. You are cheek to cheek. You smell the cologne on his neck. His arm pulls you in close, clinging tightly to your waist and he clutches your hand in his. Your legs tangle in step together, your bodies gently sway in synch. You whisper in each other's ear and laugh at private jokes.

And there is no doubt you are tight and very together.

I don't know about you, but I like being identified with my husband. I like knowing we go together. Every romantic encounter cements the idea of "US" in our heads, helping us behave and act like a unit, like one, as God intended.

Romance provides memories to bond you.

I can think of several special encounters with my husband--a kiss in the fog by the pond after we first uttered "I love you", his arranging the delivery of a gift and handwritten note for me each day he was gone on a 12-day trip, the way he grabs my hand under the table when we pray over meals, sleeping in our living room next to the lit Christmas tree, eating dinner outside in Ancient Rome with rain lightly falling on the awning over us, unexpected and touching e-mails, a hot tub in Louisiana...These make up who we are as a couple. Romantic moments build memories to fall back on in tough days. When times are not so idyllic, they serve to remind us who we have been, who we are. I may think him insensitive today, but recalling a thoughtful gesture or special night in the past reminds me what is true about him. Focusing on truth sustains a marriage.

Romance provides emotional connection.

When I asked my husband what he thought about romance in marriage, whether he felt it was necessary or not, he reflected for a moment (he's becoming more like me every day--woo hoo!) and then he said, "Yeah...it's fun. It's a good way for guys in particular to get in touch with their emotions." Can you believe this guy? I couldn't get better answers if I was feeding them myself!

But I think he's on to something. As I've been pondering this topic the last few days, one thing that came to mind was how often romantic interludes include or lead to sexual intimacy. There's no coincidence there. Romantic moves make women feel special, loved and more apt to offer themselves to their husbands. The emotional connection draws us to one another, enhancing our physical relationship. And who would say the extra effort was not well worth it when it leads to more satisfying and meaningful sexual encounters? This could be a whole topic in itself (Trust me, you don't want to get me started on this one.). The sexual union is a critical component in any marriage and is too often dismissed. Sex is not just for fun. It also builds unity, oneness and trust. Any additional help we can give to this area is vital to the health of our marriages. Are you hearing what I'm saying?!

Romance provides retreat and sanctuary.

Life is tough. Responsibilities wear us down. We get tired, at least I do, of the same routine, the same work, the same duties. Perhaps it is a personal weakness of mine, but I often long to escape the ordinary. An enchanted evening gives me a break from the everyday. It doesn't have to be much, dinner together, a walk on a summer evening. Even the suggestion of romance offers reprieve. Every so often my husband will snuggle into me and whisper, "I wish I could take you away somewhere". It gets me every time. To know he thinks of it (at least as often as I) is almost as good as actually going.

A little romance reminds us there is more to life than work and responsibilities. When I'm able to have time alone with my man, I let down. I feel like me again and know there's more to me than any of the roles I fill. Romantic time with my husband makes me feel special and important. We find refreshment and fun, relaxation and joy. There is sanctuary from the outside world. How beautiful of God to design marriage to accommodate this need for retreat. There is something very good about finding solace from life's problems in each other.


Lest you think me a complete idealist, let me tell you I'm completely aware of how difficult it can be to cultivate romance in marriage. We have four kids. We know all about hectic schedules and good intentions and interruptions! I wish I could say we have it all figured out, but then I'd be lying. As hard as it can be, every effort, whether successfully executed or not, tells our mate they are important. Times reserved for the two of you are never wasted. Maintaining romance in our unions will sustain and greatly enhance the enjoyment in our marriages. It's worth fighting for.

Romance matters. Indeed.

Visit Chrysalis for more Marriage Monday posts.

Not Missing the Best by Looking Too Hard

I sit in the van waiting for my daughter to get out of school. The temperatures have been cooler in my corner of the world lately, a perfect 72 degrees this afternoon. The sun is shining, a slight breeze blowing and I am thankful for this little delay in my day. I put the window down, prop a leg on the door, lean my head back on the seat and breathe deeply.

Aaah.

I rack my brain trying to come up with a good analogy to my spiritual life (something good for the blog, you know) and it occurs to me the moment itself is enough. I am thankful for the gift of a beautiful day and a brief break to soak in its splendor.

Thank You, Lord. Your beauty soothes my spirit.

The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge.

Psalm 19:1-2

To read more Thankful Thursday posts, visit Sting My Heart.

Heart Flutters

Every time my husband called, the news got worse.

It started with, "Dad fell off a ladder. They think he broke his leg or hip. I'm headed up to the hospital."

Then I got, "The leg isn't broken, but he may have messed up his knee and he has a pretty good gash on the back of his head."

Next, "The leg is fine, but there's a thoracic fracture."

And before the afternoon was over it became, "He's fractured several vertebrae and broke ribs, which punctured his lung. His left leg is weak and they think there's some pressure on his spinal cord. He's going into surgery as soon as the room is available."

Thus began a very tough week for our family.

My father-in-law is your quintessential good guy. He's always there to help, works hard and never complains. He comes in, gets the job done (VERY well), and then goes about his business. He calls himself rent-a-husband and he's paid his dues at our house, for sure. He's strong, but tender-hearted, tough, yet gentle. Though he's quiet, he says a lot when he speaks. With the same hands he'll fix my dryer, wipe tears from his eyes, replace a broken window or pray with hurting people.

But my favorite quality is what I call the Boesiger charm. Whenever they've eaten at our house, he never leaves without a hug and a kiss on my cheek. He'll flash me his cock-eyed grin, give me a wink and say, "Thank you, Tami." At church he'll sidle up next to me, put an arm around my waist, cock an eyebrow and ask, "How are you?" I'm not sure how he does it, but he melts my heart like a little girl every stinkin' time he grins my way. Don't tell him (or my mother-in-law), but I think he could get me to do about anything with only that smile.

It was tough seeing him lay in the ICU and it got worse day after day as there seemed to be no change. His fall occurring on my daughter's tenth birthday brought back bad memories of my own father dying on my son's tenth birthday. Seeing him hooked up to so many machines and missing his essence in his eyes when they were open caused me to plead, "Oh, God, please, I can't do this again already."

On his fifth day in ICU, his ventilator tube was removed and he was finally able to communicate some, but his voice was very weak and raspy. He spent most of the day sleeping and looked completely spent as my husband and I were leaving. I teased my mother-in-law about messing with him all the time and told her to watch out because before too long he was liable to side swipe her to leave him alone. He didn't say a thing or open his eyes, but he smiled and nodded his head. I felt a little relief seeing his humor coming back. I bent down, kissed his cheek and turned to leave, thinking he was asleep, when out of nowhere he said softly, "Made my day."

Mine too. Wow. He did it to me again, half-conscious.

I saw a glimpse of HIM again that night and was encouraged. God is good. He has turned a corner, but please continue to pray for he and my mother-in-law. There's a long road ahead with plenty of anxiety and questions and pain. We praise God for bringing him this far and trust His faithfulness to bring them through each day. Thank You, Lord.

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.

Lamentations 3:22-26