Heroes

One line of the video hit me:

Heroes are made because they are moved . . .

I've never thought of myself as a hero. Does anybody? I spend a lot of my life feeling pretty puny. Yet in the last week, I've had a lot of people, and I mean A LOT, give me good wishes regarding my trip to Uganda, people I know well and some I've never had a conversation with. Some have said things about me I don't understand. They talk about being obedient and ministering to others and having a servant's heart and being a blessing. I thank them and listen, but inside I'm shaking my head. I'm thinking I'm nothing special. Really. I only said YES. There's nothing heroic or extraordinary about that. I said YES. Period.

But when I heard that line in church in Greeley, Colorado this morning, I was stirred. Is it possible for ordinary people like you and me to be heroes?! Are tender hearts the only qualification? Are the people who seek God and listen for His voice and love where they live, are they the real heroes? Does He stamp an invisible S on the chests of those who just say YES?

If so, being a hero is easy. We listen to our hearts. We don't shy away from God's nudges. We love and live in response to Almighty God. It doesn't take a trip to Africa. It takes an open spirit, willing to do whatever He asks.

Heroes are made because they are moved . . .

How is God moving YOU to be a hero?

A Beautiful YES

My 8-year-old nephew blessed my socks off last week.

He's been excited about my upcoming trip to Uganda. He told me he has his whole class at school praying about it. He's given me tips on making immunizations less painful. He knows where Uganda is on a map. All of this has touched me, but he put a big cherry on top with this note he sent.


Is that about the sweetest thing you've ever seen?! What's more, the envelope contained not a dollar, but a five dollar bill. That's a lot of money for an 8-year-old!

But he's not the only one who's given like this. I've been completely overwhelmed with the way people have donated money toward this trip. For a while I felt burdened by the huge responsibility to anyone who pledged their hard-earned cash. I wanted to make the most of their sacrifice, you know? I asked God over and over and over, "How do I honor these gifts? What must I do to ensure they don't feel it a waste?"

The pressure brought me to tears. More than a few times. Why am I given this privilege? What will it require of me?

My smart husband and friends assure me people are only doing what God lays on their hearts to do, just like I did by agreeing to go. Giving their money is a way to be part of God's work, to be faithful to God's calling. It's their way to say YES.

That's beautiful, don't you think? Tons of individuals, young and old alike, each with a unique story, all saying YES to God. I am so humbled by that picture, and so proud of people, some of whom I barely know, who had the courage to write a check or put cash in cards. Surely God is nodding and smiling, pleased by the willingness to do what He says, to show the world, to show ME, what humble obedience looks like.

And I'm proud of you, Kaden, for hearing God whisper to your heart and being brave enough to trust Him with your money. You have given a very special gift. I can't wait to see what God has in store for your $5 in Uganda.

Ripples

All I did was say YES.

God made it clear He wanted me to go to Uganda. I said YES and now, before I've even gone, the ripples begin.

My kids seem to understand it. My daughters make sure I commit. They say they're proud of me. My college kids put links on their Facebook pages. My seventeen-year-old son makes me a "money" jar and quietly sets it by my computer on my birthday. They all say it's "cool" and seem to look at me with more respect.

Lots of people, some I hardly know, give me money to make it possible. They give sacrificially. They ask and seem genuinely interested. They express excitement and happiness. They say they're proud of me. ME!

My little nephews, only 7 and 5, pray for this trip every night and can find where I'm going on any map. Their mother says it's a gift to HER to see her children grasping this.

A woman hands me a jug of change, having no idea how much is in it, and thanks ME for moving her husband.

I take my son to his appointment and the friend who works there asks about it. I just tell the story of how it came about, and soon the new receptionist and a stranger in the waiting room get engaged, their eyes sparkling, asking questions of their own when my friend gets pulled away. They seem genuinely interested and excited for this woman they don't know.

Little ripples. And I've done nothing except say YES to God.

I see it and my eyes open wide in astonishment, that is, when they aren't misting over with tears. I swallow hard. God can use ME?! My little YES matters? It can make a difference in people's lives? Unbelievable!

It's taken so little to gain a bigger perspective, a picture of a God who orchestrates things beyond our imagination, who makes every little thing matter. And I know it's true because I'm seeing it. Every little act done in secret, every little YES, is used by God who takes the smallest effort and multiplies it for His good in miraculous ways, just like loaves and fish. He moves and He speaks and is alive and when we have the courage to say YES, He uses it in remarkable, incredulous ways. We are BLESSED and the blessing ripples out to those around us.

Is fear holding you back from saying YES? Take a deep breath, my friend, and dive in. You won't believe the ripples you make if you do. It will take your breath away.



Photo Credit: richardefreeman

Put Up or Shut Up

I mean well. Doesn't that count for something?

I make big goals and bold statements to God. I tell Him I'll do whatever He asks. But when the task isn't as glamorous or exciting as I'd like, I get disappointed. I question Him. I whine.

I forget God is a fan of Do What You Say.

Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few. When you make a vow to God, do not delay in fulfilling it. He has no pleasure in fools; fulfill your vow. It is better not to vow than to make a vow and not fulfill it.

If I say I'll do whatever He asks, that includes whatever He asks, whether I deem it worthy or not. He doesn't require us to promise anything. He just wants us to follow through on what we do. If it comes out of our mouth, He'll hold us to it. He's a God of His Word. He wants us to be too. If I say I'll do anything, I better do anything! God's not much for smooth talkers either.

These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.

Is that a nice way of saying, "Put up or shut up?" Am I guilty of talking big, but delivering little? Do I put on a good show, yet fail to reflect it inwardly? Do my actions match up with my words? If I say, "I'm Your girl, God," yet sigh over the lackluster job He gives, have I condemned myself? Have I proven my heart is far from Him?

Do I believe what I say? Do I DO what I say?

“The kind of religion that God requires, and will accept, does not consist in weak, dull, and lifeless “wouldings”–those weak inclinations that lack convictions–that raise us but a little above indifference. God, in his word, greatly insists that we be in good earnest, fervent in spirit, and that our hearts be engaged vigorously in our religion.”

Jonathan Edwards

Am I just a woman with good intentions or am I a godly woman? How can I tell? How do I know if my "religion" honors God or disgusts Him?

Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. He who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him.

Faith that honors God, does what He says, does whatever He says. Faith that He accepts, is genuine and active, not frustrated and whiny.

Lord, I'm guilty of saying I'll do anything for you, but complaining about what You set before me. Make me earnest, fervent and engaged in any assignment You give. Help me put up or shut up.

How can you "put up" better?

What do you think of this Jonathan Edwards' quote? Link up and share your thoughts.




Scripture passages taken from: Ecclesiastes 5:2, 4-5; Isaiah 29:13; John 14:21

Buying God a Smoothie

The thought appeared when I noticed a woman in the parking lot who looked a little like a woman I'm acquainted with. You should take her a smoothie. It sounded ridiculous. She would think I was crazy. I don't really know the woman, but she's been sick. Could an unexpected treat brighten her spirits?

Years ago when these sorts of ideas popped into my head, I would dismiss them as being silly. Why would I take a smoothie to someone I barely know? What would she think? What if she hates smoothies? What flavor do I even buy? Would she want the whipped cream or not? But over the years God has taught me to do it anyway. Though it's scary, I've had some really neat encounters with people by following these "silly" suggestions. I've decided they are God's calling and the sooner I do them, the faster I get the blessing for being obedient. I reason it can't hurt anything, right? Doesn't the thought count? Even if the woman hates smoothies, someone thinking of her may mean something. And what's the big deal for me, a few bucks and ten minutes?

So I bought the smoothie, looked up her address (that tells you how well I know her) and went straight to her house. When I got there, the front door was open and I was hopeful I caught her there. Still not sure how I would explain it, I trusted God to bring the words the way He always does, and rang the doorbell. No answer. I rang it again. Nothing. I peeked in and saw nothing. I knocked on the storm door. No movement. I knocked harder. Nada.

Was I imagining a message from God? She wasn't home or maybe wasn't in any shape to come to the door. What was I supposed to do with that? By this time the smoothie was half melted and I really didn't want to eat it myself, so I took it to my husband. As I drove away from his office I wondered what just transpired. And another thought popped into my brain.

. . . whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.

Matthew 25:40

Does it count if she never knew about it? If she didn't receive the smoothie, was the task completed? Was it a waste? "But you did it," God whispered, "You did it for me."

So I guess I bought God a smoothie today and got a whole new perspective on how the act doesn't matter as much as the obedience. How the other party responds, or whether they know of your attempts at kindness, is irrelevant. Whatever we do for one of the least of these brothers (whether they know or understand or appreciate it), we do for God.

How have you "bought God a smoothie?"



Photo Credit: LA Wad

A Reason to Do It Anyway

When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.

Proverbs 10:19

This is not good news for a blogger. Or a Bible study leader. Or someone who aspires to be a writer and occasionally finds herself standing before others telling her story.

When words are many, sin is not absent.

Yikes.

My very next word has the potential to sin, to damage, to destroy. And I put words out there for all the world to see? What's the matter with me?! Am I asking for trouble?

I consider myself a pretty NON-confrontational type of person. I don't like to ruffle feathers. Criticism or disagreement get to me. I'm not one to stir up trouble, at least not on purpose.

So why do I do this? Why does this people pleasing introvert subject herself to possible sin and scorn?

I just can't help it. These thoughts whir and stir and I figure if I'm feeling a certain way, I can't be the only one. I take to heart Paul's words in 2 Corinthians that tell us to comfort others with the comfort we have received from God. I tell myself no one cares what I think, but God says, "Do it," so I do. I hope I don't sound stupid and often feel the work is "hack," but I'm learning to trust Him to make good of it.

I see myself as one of the stones Jesus referred to.

“I tell you,” he replied, “if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out.”

Luke 19:40

I have to cry out. Everything in me wants others to know.

So I'll take a deep breath each time my fingers hit the keyboard. I'll pray like crazy for divine inspiration and guidance and protection. I'll take the risk and work through the blather and do what God says to do.

It's my reason to do it anyway.

What do you do simply because God tells you to do it?


Photo Credit: Biappi

What Do You Do With the Grrrr?

Sometimes things eat at me. I'll think I've put them behind me and then out of no where I find myself talking about them again. With passion and anger, guilt and tears. We have many ways to describe our letting it all out.

Venting
Seeking counsel
Whining
Gaining perspective
Complaining
Confiding in a trusted adviser
Releasing the tension

We use pretty terms to rationalize (and excuse?) our behavior, but what is the right way to handle pent up feelings? Is it necessary to let them out? What happens when we don't? What is the Biblical way to deal with them?

When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.
Proverbs 10:19

Do everything without complaining or arguing
Philippians 2:14

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
Ephesians 4:29

I know these verses and have recited them to myself for years, but there's something about getting it out that feels better. Once I've spoken it I can let it go easier. Often as I'm spewing my junk, I hear how ridiculous it sounds out loud and am shamed into silence. If I only vent to my husband, isn't that okay? I mean, we are as one, so technically I'm talking to myself, right?

Hmmm. I have noticed though, that just like potato chips (you can't eat just one), once I open my mouth I'm more tempted to do it again and the problem with that is, not only can it border on gossip, but I'm tainting the opinion of the person I'm venting to. Will they get a bad taste in their mouth over something I've said?

But often someone gives me a different perspective, helps me make better sense of a situation, shows me the error in my thinking, sets me straight. In that case, saying something is worth it. How long would I have carried the grrr with me otherwise?

Once I'd been upset with my husband and held it in for six months when it exploded all over him. I never want to repeat that. Oooh. So ugly. And definitely not healthy for our marriage. How was our union affected that six months?

But here's my biggest struggle. I can't find scripture to support venting. Can I use verses like these? Talking things over with a trusted friend can help.

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17

Ugh. Do you see my dilemma? I want to handle this correctly. Can you do it with a trusted few you know will not repeat your angst? Should you never utter negativity? If I have a problem with someone, should I only talk to that person? But what if you can't? What do you do with the grrr then? I don't know the answer. At times I've been encouraged by sharing my pent up feelings, but others times I've carried guilt afterward. I've worked on this post for at least six weeks, waiting for God to bring the answer and so far have heard nothing. I figure I need help. Has He spoken to you on the issue?

What is your opinion on venting?



Photo Credit: Artworks Creative Communities

Dangerous Ignorance

He sat on our kitchen counter, lingering long past the others, desperately asking why he couldn't be closer to God. Why did he feel so far away? He read his Bible and it meant nothing. Yet he saw a difference in the other kids in our Bible study group. He wanted the peace he saw they had. He wanted a real relationship with God.

We talked long about sin and our need for a Savior, accepting Christ, and the gift of the Holy Spirit to help us interpret what we read. And when he finally left hours later, I saw hope in his eyes I'd never seen before. I praised God for my new brother in Christ and vowed to help him in his faith journey.

You know the phrase, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink?" Yeah.

He did great as long as he attended Bible study, but when school got out and he went home for the summer . . . crash and burn. Big time. I didn't understand it. He'd given his life to Jesus. He studied the Word. How could he fall so quickly?

He completely disregarded a key component in a vibrant Christian walk.

Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.

James 1:22

Our friend read the Word. He knew OF it, but didn't DO it, stopping the words from transforming him into a new creature.

“We must allow the Word of God to confront us, to disturb our security, to undermine our complacency and to overthrow our patterns of thought and behavior.”

by John Stott

He didn't want to do that, and to be fair, many of us shirk at that too. We want the peace of God, the security of God, without cost or sacrifice. Like our friend, we're all guilty at times of wanting to live life according to our rules with God along as a safety net.

Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. He who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him.

John 14:21

We cannot thrive in our relationship with God without following His Word and letting it remake us. There are no shortcuts to obedience.

Will you maximize your efforts to become closer to God? Will you read and OBEY His Word?

Visit MiPa at Miriam Pauline's Monologue to see what others thought about this quote.

The Beauty of Growth

I'm proud of her, my friend.

God asked her to do something tough and while it would be easier to ignore His call, she listens and pushes aside her fear and obeys His leading. She does as much as He gives her and waits, living every day with a burden she'd rather get rid of. Though she wishes she didn't have to, she deals with the pain, trusting God to make good of it and moves forward in an uncertain journey, strictly because He tells her to.

And wow, does she shine.

It's obvious God is working. His touch shows. Her faith grows and the beauty it brings out in her makes me a little jealous of the burden He's placed on her.

" . . . to refuse to bend our shoulders to carry a load is to miss a new opportunity for growth."

J.R. Miller from Streams in the Desert

She gives me incentive to say yes when God asks something hard of me. She shows me pain provides growth and growth displays His glory. She gives me courage, helping me see there is nothing to fear in hard times.

She makes me want to grow.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

Romans 5:3-5

Now it's your turn. What thoughts did this quote inspire in you? Let us into your head and link up below.

To Be More Like Mary

When God asked her to do the unthinkable, Mary asked a logistical question, then said, "I am Your servant."

She lived through the gossip, the scorn, the humiliation, the doubt and did what God asked, fulfilling His call. Literally seeing the fruit of her labor and receiving confirmation from others, she looked at how God used her sacrifice and pondered. No questions. No explanations. No words at all.

Only pondering.

She let God have His way, treasuring it in her heart.

How I want to be more like her. God asks me to do something hard and I beg for help. I look to others for validation. I worry my sacrifice is not good enough. Instead I should be a servant and do the work. I should watch for how God uses it.

And ponder.



Photo Credit: Sunfrog1

What is Required?

I am overwhelmed by God's goodness.

Why do His blessings overflow to this very ordinary human, this imperfect, struggling woman? Who am I to deserve His benevolence? Moving beyond my astonishment, I wonder one thing.

What do His blessings require of me?

Jesus clearly states, "When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required." So what is my responsibility? What does He expect from me in return? How do I respond appropriately to His goodness?

What can we bring to the Lord? What kind of offerings should we give him? Should we bow before God with offerings of yearling calves? Should we offer him thousands of rams and ten thousand rivers of olive oil? Should we sacrifice our firstborn children to pay for our sins? No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.

Micah 6:6-8

Lord, I recognize Your great goodness to me and I overflow with gratitude. There is no way to repay Your mercy. Enable me to do what is right, to take Your truth and abide by it. Help me see others and love them as You do. May I always recognize my need and dependence on You. If much is required of me, give me the energy, the motivation, the courage to complete Your will. To You alone be the glory.



Photo Credit: prayerfriends

The Moment of Decision

“If we’re going to become the women God wants us to be, we’re going to have to begin being consciously selective, which means we ask ourselves questions like: Is this the best use of my time, money, energy, and resources? Is this God’s highest and best for me? Is it the healthiest thing for my spirit, soul, and body? … Do my daily choices reflect my true values or am I taking the path of least resistance simply to avoid the hard work of making conscious selections?”

by Donna Partow
Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be: A 90-Day Guide to Living the Proverbs 31 Life

When I get snippy with my family, I don't think of myself as making a choice. Getting snarky with pokey drivers in front of me surely can't be controlled, can it? Do I purposely neglect others? Can't I call it forgetfulness? The heavy sigh at my husband's remark isn't a conscious decision, is it? Have I really exercised my will when I absentmindedly pop the last cookie in my mouth?

I know the correct answers (YES!), but WOW is that defeating. I don't think before I act or speak or even let my mind dwell somewhere. I completely understand Paul's lament--"For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing." (Romans 7:19)

But if I can't do the simplest of tasks with purpose, how can God use me? How can His Spirit reside in someone with so little self-control? How can I become a woman of "conscious selection?"

I pray for Him to show me the moment of decision, that instant where I make a choice. I pray He stops and reminds me I choose to utter derogatory comments at slow poke drivers or inflame a sticky situation at home saying something that doesn't need to be said or ignore someone who may need a hug. I pray for an awareness of what I'm about to do.

I pray for the moment of decision.

God is faithful, of course, but as soon as He started answering this prayer I found a greater need to pray for discipline and courage to make the right choice, but that's a whole other story.

May God make us people of awareness, people consciously choosing His best. May He show us our moments of decision.

Join our host Patricia at Typing One-Handed to see more impressions of this quote.

Revisiting WBS

To take a few days to play, I decided to rerun some old posts this week. This particular post came from the first month I started blogging, back on June 29, 2006.

It's official.

I have WBS. I've suspected it for years, but rationalized it away. The symptoms have been there my whole life, but who wants to admit to having such a malady? I didn't want to be treated differently. Some hinted I may have it and my husband has suffered from my condition for decades. Finally we have a diagnosis.

I have Whiny Baby Syndrome.

It was confirmed on Monday while I was having lunch with a couple of friends. No, they didn't tell me I have it. They're much too nice for that. But you know you have Whiny Baby Syndrome when you find yourself getting defensive when pushed for an explanation or when the words coming out of your own mouth suddenly sound stupid. You can be sure there is a problem when pointed questions punch you in the gut and really nice people give you a half-hearted "Mmm" while nodding their heads slowly, their facial expressions resembling people who are not buying the swampland in Florida or your story.

I was sure I had WBS when I heard my recent responses to the question. You know, THE question this time of year, "How's your summer going?" Some sob story came out of me about how my summer had just begun because my husband's production was finally over. One night was especially embarrassing when I told a couple that church "crap" (yes, I actually used that word--OUCH--see how bad I have it?) was biting into our summer. PLEASE! My life is not that bad. (Funny, you'd think I'd know this. One of my kids hears this about his own life nearly daily.) My life is very good, in fact. I have nothing to complain about. I must be a whiny baby.

"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe" (Philippians 2:14-15).

OW, OW, OW!!! Forgive me if you have had to endure my complaining and thank you for your patience. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to clean up my star (it's not shining so good) and tend to the gaping hole in my head.



Photo Credit: Addrox

What God Sees as Great

I've talked before on this blog about wanting to do big things for God. I want to be like Moses or Abraham or Mary. I want to achieve something truly miraculous that points tons of people to Him.

And for some reason I've assumed I haven't or don't or my efforts aren't big enough, aren't worthy of the "great" title.

But today a precious friend said something I won't soon forget.

"Whatever God asks of you, doing it and obeying Him is what makes it great."

A great work for God is anything we do in obedience to Him. We show God His importance in our life by doing what He asks, no matter how ordinary or mundane or unimportant we view it. Obeying His call makes our work spectacular in His eyes.

Heeding God's nudging to help someone carry packages becomes a great work of God. Making the phone call we dread simply because God said to, gains His nod of approval. Leading a Bible study or writing a book which seem beyond us, but doing it anyway because He's asked us, is worship of a Holy God who deserves it.

Being great is only a matter of obeying, of doing what He asks.

So today I expose myself in a blog post trusting it is a big work for God. I pray I've made Him smile.

If you love me, you will obey what I command.

John 14:15

How will you be great today?



Image Credit: Rosencruz Sumera

Excuses

“The king’s heart is in the hand of the Lord; He directs it like a watercourse wherever he pleases. All a man’s ways seem right to him, but the Lord weighs his heart. To do what is right and just is more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice.”

Proverbs 21:1-3

King Saul learned this lesson the hard way. When told to completely destroy the Amalekites, he carried out God's instructions. . .kind of. He destroyed everything except the best of the livestock and the Amalekite king. When Samuel confronted him with his slight variance from his directions, Saul says, "The soldiers took sheep and cattle from the plunder, the best of what was devoted to God, in order to sacrifice them to the Lord your God at Gilgal."

I don't know about you, but it sounds like an excuse made up on the spot. But, but, we did it for the Lord! Uh huh. I think Samuel thought it was an excuse too, because he responded, "Does the Lord delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the Lord? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams."

How many times have I done the same thing, given an excuse for my wrong behavior?

I just wasn't awake enough to comprehend Your Word properly, so I checked Facebook while I woke up and then the kids got up early.

Lord, I couldn't stop to talk to that lady, because my kids were waiting in the van and I have to be a good mother first.

But if I brought her flowers, I might not have enough money for my church offering, plus the time involved takes away from other activities I do for You.

Visiting her in the hospital would be awkward for her too.

You know how long she keeps me on the phone. If I call, I probably won't get my Bible study lesson finished.

Yeah, right. Who am I kidding? I can use all sorts of good reasons to excuse my behavior, but God's not buying it.

To do what is right and just is more acceptable than sacrifice. To obey is better than sacrifice.

May God help us recognize our excuses and motivate us to obey.

Jesus replied, "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him."

John 14:23

Join Nina at Mama's Little Treasures for more thoughts on this quote.



Photo Credit: TheTruthAbout

Being Bad Just Once

But Jonah ran away from the LORD and headed for Tarshish.
He went down to Joppa, where he found a ship bound for that port.
After paying the fare, he went aboard and sailed for Tarshish to flee from the LORD.

Jonah 1:3

I was the good girl, the one who followed her parents' rules, the one who never got into trouble. My sister and cousin consistently called me "square." (Don't think I haven't forgotten, girls. You forever scarred my psyche!) I didn't let them deter me from doing what I knew to be right, but it did smart a little. Being good wasn't good enough. Being good was the right thing, but being good was (dare I say it?) boring.

Nobody pays attention to the good kid. She does what she's expected to do. There's no drama, no excitement there. I wanted to be bad, just once, to shock everybody around me, to show people this good girl had some spunk. But when the urge hit, I'd ignore it every time. I didn't want to live with the guilt of doing something I knew I shouldn't. Don't be impressed. I was just chicken.

Until one night in college I found myself particularly vulnerable. I was lovesick and my dear boyfriend was traveling across the country, without a stop near Nebraska for months. I wasn't planning on going to the party after the Homecoming game, but some friends convinced me it would be good to get out. I sat among a bunch of happy people, yet felt very alone and sad, not joining the festivities, only staring at two punch bowls marked "yes, it is" and "no, it isn't."

And because I was melancholy, because I was sick of doing the right thing, because the person who knew me best was in who knows what church that night singing for God, leaving me there to fend for myself, I decided to "live a little" and bellied up to the "yes, it is" punch bowl, the yes, it is SPIKED punch bowl. All night. I always did what God asked and where had it gotten me? Everyone got to slip up. Why couldn't I? And who would even care?

I did some pretty stupid things that night. After the "yes, it is" punch was gone, I started mixing my own. I went cruising with guys I didn't know (Thank the Lord for good friends who were looking out for me. I owe you BIG TIME!). I used words I never utter and embarrassed myself so much I didn't want to leave my apartment the next day. But my belly of the fish moment came when I lifted the glass to my lips for the zillionth time that night and saw a friend over the rim. She was a year younger than me and had been through a tough time herself. She talked to me often. I knew she looked up to me and respected my opinion, but when our eyes met that night, all I saw was confusion. She said nothing, but her body language screamed, "What are you doing?!"

In one fell swoop, I lost my credibility, my respectability, and my dependability, qualities which took years to develop. Stupid.

I'm back to being a good girl according to most people's standards (if you don't count the Ozarks--ha!). I learned the hard way not to flee from God, not even for one night. His ways may be demanding and tough, but they are for our protection. Always. There's no taking breaks from Him, unless you want to roll around in the muck for a while. We can flee, but He'll find us every time.

To join the In "Other" Words meme and read more impressions of this quote, visit MiPa at Miriam Pauline's Monologue.

Shining For Him

It is quieter than normal in her living room. Though her smile normally lights up a room, today it is absent. Instead there are tears and confusion and deep, deep thought. She says something then stares at the floor. I hate to break the quiet and something in me tells me to wait, so I do. More pain comes gushing out and then more silence. The pattern continues and soon I find myself in wonder. My beautiful, beautiful friend is processing past hurt and emotions she has tried to avoid, simply because God says it is time.

He tells her, "Let it out, deal with it, feel it." While it cuts to her core, she decides she must because as she puts it, "I feel worse, but I know it's going to be better." Amid the sorrow there is hope. And I see the desire in her to know God more, to experience the freedom only He can give.

She knows it won't be fun. She's sure He'll ask her to do things she doesn't want to, but she'll do them. She's determined to follow Him wherever He leads. She has to. Her heart truly belongs to Him.

“Still, accepting God’s existence is one thing; honoring his command is another matter entirely, especially if we’re required to go back when we’d rather go forward.”

~Liz Curtis Higgs

And here I am, sitting on her couch, watching God do His thing, seeing her respond with humility and trust. She has never been more beautiful. My already high esteem jumps up considerably and I thank God I know this woman who challenges me to be better. God's touch is evident. I am so proud of her.

I can't help but wonder if I have that courage. Would I be willing to take a step back for God? Could I walk through pain only because God said it was necessary? I'd like to think I would, but just in case, I'll keep hanging with this girl. She's sure to lead the way.


For more impressions on this week's quote, visit Miriam Pauline's Monologue.

Because You Say So

He was tired. It had been a long night and he'd been humoring the guy for a while now, giving Him a better vantage point to speak from in his boat. Maybe this is why Simon's answer is so beautiful to me. Jesus told him to go to deeper waters and cast his nets one more time and Simon replies,

Master, we've worked hard all night and haven't caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets. (Luke 5:5)

Because You say so. . .

Wow. Do you see it? He admits his doubt in catching anything, yet does what Jesus says anyway. What a display of trust and humility! It reminds me of the "As you wish" from The Princess Bride. No arguments, no agitation, only simple obedience. Because You say so. . .Do you think if I can say it sincerely, not grudgingly, it could bring about real change in my life?

Lord, I will do what you ask because You say so.
I will walk through that dark valley because You say so.
I can do what is awkward and uncomfortable because You say so.
Though it doesn't make sense, though I am tired and afraid, I will do it because You say so.
Even when others don't understand and I'm not sure I have it me, when the road gets long, I will press on because You say so.
Though no one may ever know, I will serve You to the best of my ability because You say so.
Whether I am rewarded or not, because You say so I'm your girl.

I'm not one for New Year's resolutions. They're just one more thing to beat myself up about later. I'm too weak-willed and undisciplined to do anything on my own. But when I see it as a commitment to my gracious God, I am more likely to stick to it. I'm adopting Simon's words as my motto for 2008 and trusting God to work it out for His glory in my life.

Because You say so. . .

Will you say it with me? Will you help me rock our world one yes at a time? Can you push aside the fear, the indecision, the weariness and plod ahead simply because He tells you to?

We are Yours, Lord, and we will impact our little corners of our worlds for You because You say so. May Your will be done. Thank You for a fresh start to serve You anew.

Happy New Year, my friends.

Asking for Blinders

When I confessed my feelings of weakness to her, she came back with an unexpected response. She said, "I found that I did not feel strong even when people said it until I faced some fears I have. I have really dealt with those and it has made a huge difference in how strong I feel."

Hmm. . .I had to think on that for a while and pray over it.

Lord, is there something I'm afraid of? Do I have some fears I need to face?

You're afraid people won't like you.

What's wrong with that? I know I want people to like me and what I have to say, and it bothers me when they don't, but why is that a problem? I'm discovering that doing what God has asked me to do does not shelter me from conflict. Some people may be critical and judgmental and assume all kinds of things about me that may or may not be true. There will be some I love and respect who disagree with me. I have a hard time reconciling that. How can that be? How can believers see things so differently sometimes? Yet, situations like this are documented throughout the Bible. Job and his friends did not see his situation the same. Paul and Barnabas did not see eye to eye. Jesus' own people, the Jews, thought Him a radical.

What does my fear reveal? Distrust. Doesn't the Holy Spirit work within me? If I am seeking God and consistently in His word and praying and growing in my faith, how can I mess things up? Can't God take even disagreements that may arise and make them into something good? Am I trying to please men instead of God?

I know this is a pretty simple concept and in my head I understand I can't please everybody, but apparently my heart hasn't accepted the message. Worrying about what other people might think is holding me back. The same woman who gently suggested I deal with my fear also said, "If you're living a life without conflict or pain, you're playing it awfully safe." If I'm playing it safe, am I burying my talent? If I drag my feet in God's work, worried about the impressions of others, is that sin?

Any great work for God requires risk. Just ask Moses, Gideon, Esther, Paul, and Rahab. Why should I be immune? Am I willing to sacrifice acceptance, even by other believers, to obey God? Do I really have a choice?

Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.
Galatians 1:10

Fearing people, and what they may think of me, rather than Almighty God is sin. I cannot do that anymore. Lord, help me confidently forge ahead in focused determination for You.


Photo Credit: minusbaby