Hosting In "Other" Words

I'm the host this Tuesday of the weekly meme, In "Other" Words and have selected the following quote.

“Non-eucharisteo, ingratitude, was the fall–humanity’s discontent with all that God freely gives. That is what has scraped me raw: ungratefulness.”

Ann Voskamp

Tell me your thoughts and link your post back here on Tuesday morning. Happy Writing!

7 Quick Takes (Volume 142)

1) Drama Queen: Who was the cutest baby out of all us kids?

Me: How do you rate that? You had different things about you that were cute.

Drama Queen: Like what?

Me: Drummer Boy had those cute ears that stuck out.

Drama Queen: Yeah, like flaps. What about me?

Me: You had a little nose.

Drama Queen: And Ladies Man?

I looked at Kevin who I knew was thinking the same thing.

Me: He just had that ginormous head.

Miss Innocent One: What about me?

Me: You had pretty eyes and eyebrows and cute toes.

Drama Queen: How can eyebrows be cute?

Me: They laid just right.

Drama Queen (projecting her toe envy on account of her own ugly toes): Well, her toes aren't so hot.

Me: I used to worry about your butt.

Drama Queen: What?

Me: You had this huge butt. (to Kevin) Remember? I was so worried she'd have to live with that.

Kevin: Yeah. She talked about it all the time.

Drama Queen: RUDE!

Kevin: It's okay. You grew into your butt the same way Ladies Man grew into his head.

True. And Drummer Boy grew into his ears and Miss Innocent One still has cute toes. It's all good.

2) Ladies Man was gone all last week touring with Esprit de Corps, a singing group out of Lincoln, NE. They performed a concert at our church Saturday night.


It is an awesome sight to see 75 teenagers truly worshiping God. Their enthusiasm and sincerity is breathtaking. It makes me certain there is a God.

3) Sigh. We haven't talked to Drummer Boy all week. He's been working hard as a counselor at UNL Band Camp.


Since I can't see him, I've been stalking him online and got a kick out of the way his tweets of the week answer the question, "You know you're in band geek country when you hear . . ."

So far at this camp I've taken candy as bribes from students 3 times...(and the follow up comment--"I told a bedtime story in exchange for gummy worms.")

Oh my feet. I'm not even marking time.

Overheard in a crowd of campers: "We should throw a party tonight. I've got the fig newtons!"

4) Oh my, I am totally going to hear from Drama Queen about how creepy I am for stalking her brother. Maybe I should make it worse by showing I stalk her too. Isn't this the reason parents have Facebook? Here's a picture I swiped from her page.


She hasn't updated her status much. Mostly she's been commenting on other people's Facebook pages (hmmm, does that maker HER a stalker?), but this status caught my eye.

"Ahhhh, home videos. Good stuff."

And Drummer Boy liked it. I knew they thought we were okay.

5) Miss Innocent One is counting the days until her thirteenth birthday in August when she can finally get a Facebook account. Do you suppose reading this post may discourage her?

I wish I had a photo of her this week as she is as tan as a person can be. For a twelve-year-old, there are not many ways to keep yourself occupied in the summer, so she and her friends are at the pool often. Sadly, I'm a deficient mother and didn't get one snapped. Maybe next week. You'll have to trust me. This girl is TAN!

Hey, how about a picture from last week, just so she doesn't feel left out? Here's a few of the girls on her softball team posing for a picture at the firework stand of their sponsor.


6) Ladies Man is proving he could be called Renaissance Man. He tried his hand at making a smoothie the other night.


Don't you love his presentation skills? He thought of that apple garnish on his own, cutting it horizontally to provide the hole in the middle. Since he just dumped a lot of stuff in, I was skeptical to taste it, but it was really good, so good I asked for more.

Ah, perhaps there's a job I can hand over. I vote Ladies Man as the official smoothie maker for the Boesiger household. Yes. Do you s'pose I can convince him the duties include cleaning up after himself too?

7) The daughter of some of our dearest friends is getting married this weekend. We're looking forward to a rip-roaring time with our favorite people (Did you hear the chicken dance?). I must admit, though, I'm not crazy about moving into the parents-of-the-couple generation. Next thing you know I'll be donning orthopedic shoes and getting my blue hair styled. I know some of you are thinking, what's the big deal? Embrace the next stage of life. Enjoy it.

Yeah. And those of you saying that are probably like 30. Psht.

And with that we call it a day. Have a great weekend, as I plan to, and catch more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.

Why Do You Care?

She took me off guard, looking at me with solemn eyes, tears brimming. Her voice choked as she asked the question.

Why do you care?

Her eyes zeroed in on my face and the pressure mounted. She wanted more than the standard Sunday school answer we'd looked at weeks before in 1 John 4:19--We love because He first loved us.

Her question disturbed me. We all want to know what makes us lovable, unique, special. I confess I've asked my husband the same thing too many times (to his utter frustration). He tries, listing qualities he likes in me, things I've heard a million times, but ultimately he knows it doesn't matter what he says. I'll find it unsatisfying or trivial.

"I don't know why, I just do," he finally says, "I can't explain it."

And when she asks me the question, I feel the same way. I don't know why, I just do.

"Why does anyone care about anybody?" I say.

I know it's not what she wants to hear, but as I think about the people I love, her included, words seem inadequate to describe my attachment. Like me, if I start listing her admirable qualities, she'll find a way to dismiss them as unimportant or ordinary. There is no right answer.

Is it because when we ask that question--Why do you care?--we're really looking for a reason for our existence? Are we really asking, "Why am I here?" How is mere man supposed to come up with that? How can any human know why God created another?

Why do you care?

I wonder the same thing of God. With billions of people on the face of the planet, why would He care about me? How can He be intimately involved with individuals? Is this the real issue? How can the God of the universe care about me? How could He possibly love us all perfectly? How would He answer the question?

I AM. I love you.

No fancy explanations, only truth. If my faith is genuine, if I trust Him as I say I do, I will take it at that and believe it. Because what good does it do me to doubt it? I lose my peace and any purpose for my life. When I refuse to accept it, I call Him a liar. Do I really want to do that?

Why do you care?

I care because He equipped me to do so. For whatever reason, He has laid you on my heart and made you precious to me. I care because He does, because He says it.

I AM. I love you. Believe it.

Why do you care?



Photo Credit: giacomo.nodari

Be All In

Sometimes I think I'm a lousy parent.

Teenagers have a way of reinforcing that belief. The eye rolls, the disgusted sighs, the logic wars, the resistance--all have a way of screaming of my incompetence.

It's easy for me to buy into it too. I know I can be scatterbrained. I have trouble keeping the information from each kid straight. Memory fails me. I procrastinate. I put the kids off when I don't want to deal with things. I complain about their lack of help. I'm moody. I get tired of working around their schedules. Yep. Lousy parent.

But every once in a while, God gives me solace about my lack of parenting skills. Every so often, He gives me a glimpse that He's filled in my inadequacies. He shows me my kids really are connected to me.

Last week Ladies Man was gone and called twice to "see how everybody was around there." Drummer Boy drove down to show us his sweet rental car and, as is his custom, just sort of hung around at odd times of the day, not even for food! I went to Drama Queen's room and found her reading my blog. Miss Innocent One left for a weekend trip and had to give good-bye kisses twice. She even waved with a look on her face that said she'd do it again if she could.

As I think about it more, I realize my kids bring friends over OFTEN, at least a few times every week. They must not be too embarrassed by us. They love bantering at the dinner table as much as we do. They hold onto family memories. They like recalling the stories. They spend time watching home movies.

There IS connection and belonging and true love in our family, though they may not vocalize it. To be honest, I wonder how these very good things happen, when their mother possesses glaring weaknesses. With all the mistakes I've made, how do they stay tied to us?

I hope it's because they recognize I'm all in.

In the good. In the bad. In the disappointment, the fear, the stress, the crabbiness. I'm there, more than they wish I would be at times. I'm in. I always will be. They must know it. Isn't that the best any parent can do?

Don't despair about your lack of parenting skills, my friends. Pray like crazy. Find wisdom in God's Word. Do your best. Trust Him to fill in the gaps.

And be all in.

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

1 Peter 4:8

Alongside and With

“Yes, I understand that turning back or waiting for others slows you down, but only at first. The deliberate extension of goodness, generosity, and wisdom always wins out in the end.”

Lisa Bevere
“Lioness Arising: Wake Up and Change Your World”

She stayed with me.

I told her to run ahead, to get the kind of time I knew she could, but she wouldn't.

"I'll finish," I assured her, "I'll have a stinky time, but I'll finish. You don't have to worry about that."

"Oh I know you'll finish," she said.

And still she ran alongside me, without regard for her own finish.

The race was tough and I hated everything about it except having her next to me with her constant stream of truth. When we reached the finish line, my time was good for me and hers was four minutes more than her last race.

I appreciated her kindness then (and still do), but now I wonder if there may be a lesson in it. How can I "run" alongside others? How can I help them reach the finish line? What do I need to give up or let go of for the sake of another? What truth needs to be whispered in someone's ear to enable them to keep going? How can I learn to be that selfless?

After the race she told me, "I decided before we ever came that I was staying with you. This was your first race. I wanted to experience it with you."

And there's the key to coming alongside. We look at it as an opportunity to experience God's grace with someone, not as a favor to them, but as a privilege. Though it may cost us personally to turn back or wait on or run alongside another, the long term benefit is the chance to see God work. How exciting does that sound?!

Go ahead, my friends, leave your comfort zones, your routines, your busy lives and extend yourself today. Expend some personal time and energy for the sake of others. What grace is waiting to be experienced with someone?

I'm excited to find out.

For more thoughts on this quote, visit Nina at Mama's Little Treasures.

Being Honest With My Husband

His week was slammed with the holiday, helping move his parents and some friends, preparing for musical guests at church, working on writing a Christmas production and a commissioned piece for a church choir in Virginia, all on top of trying to stay above water in his job responsibilities.

I knew he was stressed. I knew he was pulled in many, many directions. I tried to be supportive and understanding and patient. But come the weekend, I was feeling neglected.

My head told me how stupid it was. My heart missed my husband.

I worked hard to push it aside, to do the next thing, to give him some space, but he could tell something was wrong. He asked, as he does often, if I was okay. I tried to blame it on being tired (which I was) and hormones (which is my catch-all scapegoat), and he accepted it, but kept asking.

Are you sure you're all right?

And though I wanted to be strong and self-sufficient and low-maintenance, though I wished I could be above such childishness, I finally admitted how I felt.

He listened, acknowledged both my feeling of neglect and embarrassment for being that way. He apologized and assured and went off to his next responsibility.

And I felt better.

Not because he dropped everything to spend time with me. Not because I suddenly became his #1 priority of the day, but because he heard me and I wasn't holding on to something stupid any more. He knew what was going on in my head, no matter how ridiculous. Somehow the honesty put us on the same page. It eliminated the guessing. We knew the deal and dealt with it.

It makes me wonder how many times I've missed this kind of openness because I've wanted to save face and not appear needy. Does my desire to be tough take away from his desire to protect me? Is it good for him to know I need him? Does it help me to admit it? If I let myself be vulnerable, will it kick in his innate desire to safeguard me?

I want to be independent. I want him to need me, not vice versa. It seems more powerful to be the one needed, instead of the needy. But if we're both determined to show ourselves un-needy, what bridges the gap to bring us together?

Yeah. I don't like it that I need my husband as much as I do, but I'm willing to admit it, for the coming together it provides.

Will you?

7 Quick Takes (Volume 141)

1) We've been helping Kevin's parents move into town which accounts for the missing posts this week. Already I can tell our family will enjoy having them here. I've told you how Miss Innocent One is often left home with her boring parents while her siblings are off doing their thing, but now her eyes glimmer as she thinks about riding her bike to G-ma and G-pa's house.

Why are they more exciting than us? They have thirty years on us, for crying out loud. Arg.

2) As I munched on a piece of chocolate, flakes of it fell on my shorts and when I tried to brush them off they smeared and I growled.

Kevin: What is your problem?

Me: This chocolate, like, melted on contact.

Kevin: It's cause you're so hot.

Me: Ooh. Good answer.

Miss Innocent One sat across the room, shaking her head.

Kevin: What?

Miss Innocent One: I'll just pretend I didn't hear that and by the way, Dad, pretty cheesy.

3) Drummer Boy was provided a rental car while his was in the shop. He's used to driving a car like this:


But got behind the wheel of this for a few days:


How will he ever go back?

4) Our family watches Judge Judy while eating lunch. I know. I know. It's a bad habit, but can I redeem myself by saying we always eat supper at the dinner table? Besides, I've written before about the life lessons we learn from Judge Judy. This day she spurred an unusual discussion.

Drama Queen: Judge Judy looks like a grasshopper.

Me: What? Where do you get that from?

Drama Queen: Just look at her. Everybody looks like an animal. Miss Innocent One looks like a gopher or an antelope.

Me: Those are not even close to each other.

Drama Queen: It depends on the angle you look at her.

Me: What about me?

Drama Queen: Hmmm. I'd say a cockatoo. (I knew my hair was pretty wild, but apparently I had no idea!)

Miss Innocent One: What about Dad?

Drama Queen: He's either a walrus (on account of the moustache?) or a bear (because of his little ears?) and obviously Ladies Man is a sasquatch.

Miss Innocent One: What about Drummer Boy?

Drama Queen: I'd say he's a manatee.

Me: How are you coming up with this?

Drama Queen: It's just how it is. My friend looks like a baby duck.

Oh my. I don't get it and I'm not straining my brain too hard to figure it out. Only at our house can you go from Judge Judy to animal doppelgangers.

5) Before making my Walmart run, I asked the kids if they needed anything.

Miss Innocent One: Can you get Bagel Bites?

Me: Honey, Bagel Bites are not food.

Of course she protested, but I held firm. (I refused to buy Bagel Bites but picked up a couple frozen pizzas. Does anyone see some screwy thinking in that? Can I claim that childbirth, as well as the stress from said children, has depleted my brain cells? Yes, let's go with that.)

Anyway, a few days later, Miss Innocent One was flipping through a Cooking Light magazine and found this:


Miss Innocent One: See Mom? Wholesome! You can feel good about what's inside! See? And it's in a Cooking Light magazine, Mom. Now can I get some?

Great. Another child who's exposed her mother's idiocy. I'm in deep trouble now folks.

6) Ladies Man has been gone all week traveling with a Christian singing and drama group. He left on Tuesday morning and was so hyped up to go that listening to his antics the entire ride to Lincoln nearly did his sleep-deprived mother in. Too few hours of sleep and a hyper adolescent do not a pleasant trip make and I wasn't prepared for his question.

Ladies Man: Will you guys miss me?

I looked at Kevin with raised eyebrows and whispered.

Me: This is probably not a good time to ask that question.

Of course it was a moment of temporary insanity and I soon missed his silliness. Apparently I wasn't the only one. By Tuesday afternoon Drama Queen wandered around the house yelling.

Drama Queen: I miss Ladies Man!

Ah. Another ray of hope!

7) I totally wimped out of a 5K I was supposed to run tonight. My running buddy and I are blaming it on the humidity and weird race time and the fact that we're only setting ourselves up for disappointment by running alongside real runners. I've been working hard to stop my wandering eyes and am certain attempting another 5K will certainly bring out the worst in me.

There. Is that enough excuses for you? Are you buying any of them?

That's okay. I know I'm a wuss. Label me a failure if you must. I can take it.

Have a great weekend, friends. Enjoy more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.