A Sweet Moment or What a Mother Hopes for Her Kids

Drama Queen's been working hard all summer to get in the best shape possible for drum line camp at the University of Nebraska. Competition is steep and she's felt the pressure, but true to who she is, her determination motivates her to put in the practice time, hours upon hours every week. At home in her room at all hours of the day, in the driveway in her swimsuit in the heat of the afternoon, at friends' houses, anywhere, any time. Her practice pad and sticks are like car keys to the rest of us. They go everywhere with her.

So when the doctor used the definitive word "fracture" and punctuated it with "slow healing bone," Drama Queen couldn't hold back the tears. This year's season is probably out for her. Her hard work culminated not in a pride of all Nebraska band uniform, but a Husker red cast.

Soon she texted her brother, Drummer Boy, who as a snare drummer on the University line had an interest in her outcome. He's been her role model, her instructor, her cheerleader, her supporter. He's the one dragging her to drum line mini-camps and encouraging her to try out for things. The common interest of drumming brought them closer through the years. Though Drama Queen's father and I don't consistently get the obsession, Drummer Boy always relates to her.

Because of that, it seemed fitting to meet him for some food after we left the doctor's office. Drama Queen wasn't hungry and would have loved to crawl into bed with the covers over her head, but it had been a while since we talked with her brother and we both missed him. Honestly I hoped he might cheer her up a little, but I didn't imagine he would touch me so.

Without any greeting, Drummer Boy walked into the restaurant, made a beeline for his sister, grabbed her into a big hug and just held her there a while. She sank into his chest and did her best to hold back the tears.

And so did I.

It reminded me of this picture taken over a year ago after a disappointing finish at drum line championships.


It's the kind of scene a mother doubts will ever occur as she listens to her kids fight over toys and who ate the last popsicle and taking too much time in the bathroom and making somebody late for school. I suppose years of bickering and learning how to live together made it that much sweeter. One hug told the real story. My kids love each other.

I'm sorry for the bad news that preceded it, but will forever treasure the memory of that moment. Our kids will be there for one another, even when we cannot. They're bound together apart from our influence.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow.


For more Thankful Thursday posts, visit Lynn and Dineen at Spiritually Unequal Marriage.

Happy Independence Day

This, then, is the state of the union: free and restless, growing and full of hope. So it was in the beginning. So it shall always be, while God is willing, and we are strong enough to keep the faith.

Lyndon B. Johnson

We keep our country strong by keeping the faith. May God grant us a willing spirit to sustain us.

Happy Independence Day!

7 Quick Takes (Volume 140)

1) Drummer Boy's roommate got married last weekend and one fun thing the couple wanted was for the groomsmen to form a worship band and play some worship songs as a prelude to the wedding.


Drummer Boy was, of course, (shall we say it together?) their drummer, and looked like he had a great time. At the request of the bride, he shaved off his beard for the occasion (such a bummer), but I guess for one day she trumps his mother.


2) I think Ladies Man is becoming a little obsessed with this size thing. He's been telling this interesting fact to anyone who will listen to him:

Ladies Man: If I get to be 7 foot tall, I will be scientifically defined as a giant.

Oh brother.

3) Drama Queen is convinced her kids will be the best behaved children on the face of the planet, in part because she won't let them get away with "jack."

Drama Queen: MY kids will never be a problem.

G-ma: Look at your dad. He's not a problem.

Drama Queen: Oh yeah? Well he's my problem now!

Me: No, he's MY problem and I'm happy about it.

Poor Kevin reacted like a hurt three-year-old.

Kevin: What? I'm a problem?

Don't worry, honey. You're a problem I hope I never get rid of.

4) Poor Drama Queen. I told you a about her spraining her wrist a few weeks back. Well, it never got to feeling better so I took her back in. We were sent to a specialist who determined she fractured her scaphoid bone which is a little bone in your wrist right below where your thumb connects to your arm. The doctor said it is a slow healing bone because of the lack of blood flow to the area. Most likely she'll be in a cast for 6-8 weeks.


This is a major blow to her as drum line camp at the University of Nebraska starts six weeks from yesterday. The doctor will check it August 1st, but her chances of being able to be part of the Cornhusker Marching Band this fall look pretty slim right now.

Of course she was upset (and so was her mother), but she's trying to make the best of it. I've been proud of her attitude. Even before we found out about the fracture she posted Proverbs 19:21 as her Facebook status.

Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.

Keep believing that babe. There are no mistakes.

5) The doctor's office told me I needed frequent flyer miles this week as I took in Drama Queen for her wrist, Miss Innocent One for a school physical and Ladies Man for an x-ray on his foot in a two day time span. Everyone in the office shook their head and suggested bubble wrap.

"When should we expect Drummer Boy?" the receptionist asked.

6) Drama Queen and Ladies Man left the house and not thirty seconds later the home phone rang displaying Ladies Man's number.

Me: Hello?

I heard Ladies Man talking, but apparently he had no idea his phone called us.

Me (a little louder): Hello? Hello?! You called your mother!

He remained oblivious chatting it up with his peeps (yes, my darling children, I did just say that).

Me (even louder): Hey, hello! You butt dialed your mother.

He continued his talking, but not to me.

Me (yelling): Hey, you butt dialed your mother!

By this time, Kevin and Miss Innocent One wandered in to see what I was yelling about.

Me: LADIES MAN! YOU BUTT DIALED YOUR MOTHER! YOU BUTT DIALED YOUR MOTHER!

We put it on speaker phone and Kevin proceeded to do his crazy man laugh which we thought for sure would rouse the boy.

No change. Miss Innocent One screamed into the phone and still nothing.

Me (as loud as I could scream): HEY!!!! YOU BUTT DIALED THE HOUSE!!!

Finally we gave up, worried that the neighbors may come over wondering what happened to our sanity. The next day when we asked him about it, he hadn't even noticed and didn't care.

It was so anticlimactic. Poop. And boo.

7) Would you believe the daughter of my friend had a bachelorette party and wanted her mother and friends to come along to be the "the life of the party?" Who knew college girls would think a trio of middle aged women were entertaining?! We went, we conquered, and had a really good time. Look how much fun we're having!


We still got it, my lovely friends!

Oh brother. Who am I kidding?! I never had "it" to begin with. They just make me look good.

That's all for me this hot, humid Friday in Nebraska, friends. Enjoy more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.

Playing Cards at Midnight

We play cards at midnight.

When uncertainties gnaw at stomach. When fear bears down. When sleep is hard to come by. When words don't comfort and anxiety steals peace.

We play cards.

We say little, letting minds be distracted by momentary diversion, using it to push aside nagging thoughts.

We play cards.

To ignore the irrational thinking, the worry. It isn't spiritual, but it is battle, resisting Satan's attempts to take control of our minds. Prayer and reading the Bible are the ultimate weapons of course, and we use them, but honestly some days comfort doesn't come quickly or easily. I think it's because God wants us to endure. How do we grow in patience if it's never tested? How do we learn to hold our ground if we never have to? So instead of lying fitfully in bed, letting our thoughts get away with us, we fill our time in simple activity. In the quietness of the late hour, the moment feels sacred.

We play cards at midnight.

And together we stand against the powers of darkness.

Have I Failed as a Parent?

“We will not hide these truths from our children but will tell the next generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord. We will tell of His power and the mighty miracles He did. So each generation can set its hope anew on God, remembering His glorious miracles and obeying His commands.”

Psalm 78:4,7 NLB

It's easy for me to get down on myself over my parenting. I read verses like this and guilt creeps in. I can't say I've ever sat my kids down Sunday school style and imparted God's Word to them. We've learned verses over the years, but not in regular fashion. Family devotion time has been inconsistent at best. We've tried working with the kids one on one in Bible study, but sadly it hasn't become a habit yet.

So, when I think about proclaiming the "glorious deeds of the Lord" to the next generation, I assume my husband and I fall short. Have we failed as parents? Is God looking down at us, shaking His head in disappointment?

While it's true we could do a better job intentionally building faith into our kids, I am amazed as they get older how much they've caught. They've espoused our values without our formal training. I see them apply Truth in every day situations and I scratch my head wondering how it happened without more deliberate attempts on our part.

Do I forget teaching comes in many forms? Is it possible to proclaim God's Truth informally?

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

Deuteronomy 6:6-7

This sounds like day to day living to me and you know what? I have accomplished this. We've talked plenty about God and relationships sitting at home at the dinner table and along the road in a vehicle. Spiritual topics come up when I'm ready to lie down (Why, oh why do kids save questions for bedtime? Why must my favorite conversations come after midnight?!)

In these daily interactions my kids have picked up on the "glorious deeds of the Lord." They hold their own convictions about drinking and marrying believers and reading their Bibles. Their ability to match Scripture to real life without even realizing it, astounds me. They possess wisdom in relationships beyond their years. Did they get this from our preaching to them? I don't think we've been consistent enough to reap rewards from that.

Is it possible that what we've lacked in formal teaching we've made up for by living out our faith authentically?

I wish I was more successful at purposefully teaching my kids about God, but I'm thankful another way they can learn is through His Spirit working in me. I'll keep trying intentional instruction, because it is important, but I won't beat myself up about my failures.

My kids have taught me not to underestimate the power of a good example.

For more ideas about this quote, visit Karen at In Love W.I.T.H. Jesus.

Throwing Away the Record

I got the vibe I didn't measure up and when we talked about it, I wasn't convinced otherwise. She was kind, intended no malice, and gave me honesty which I asked for, yet her words stung.

We're human. We do this to each other. No doubt you've experienced it yourself. I've brought others pain too. We don't understand and assume too much or expect too much and cause each other grief.

But if love keeps no record of wrongs, why does the hurt linger? Why can't we overlook it? Why don't we let it go? Why do we harbor ill feelings instead of lovingly moving on? What stops us from believing the best?

Do we lack self-control when we let our minds dwell on the negative? Aren't we empowered by the Holy Spirit to forgive? Do we need to force ourselves to forget too?

I suspect we put what we want ahead of what God wants. Is this why we carry the hurt? We want to be right, justified. Do we think we keep control by hanging on to the pain?

Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.

Romans 8:5

My sinful nature desires to point fingers, to debate, to blame, to win. But what does God want? What does the Spirit desire? Would He approve of me holding on to wounds from relationships? Does He want me weighed down by them? Don't I damage myself by doing so? Aren't I missing the victorious life the Bible promises?

Shouldn't I give others the clean slate Jesus provides for me?

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

1 Peter 4:4

If I love well, I keep no record of wrongs. It won't feel natural, because it isn't, so it will take some practice. I need lots of practice. But it's right. And good. And worth working at.

It's time to throw away the record, friends. Only then can we believe the best about others and maintain the kind of relationships Jesus desires for us.

7 Quick Takes (Volume 139)

1) Kevin sang in a men's quartet on Father's Day. As soon as he finished and sat down, Drama Queen motioned to me from across the room to check my phone.

Her text said, "Your husband is a stud. Hands down."

The poor guy can never tell if he's going to be "old school" or a stud.

2) Apparently Ladies Man has a new concern.

Ladies Man: What kind of car am I going to have to get so I can fit in it?

Kevin: What do you mean? It's not like you're ten feet tall.

Ladies Man: But what about my big feet? They can be a hazard.

Kevin: Oh brother.

Ladies Man: No really. I googled "big feet and cars" and saw a video where this guy got his foot stuck trying to use the brakes and got in an accident because of it.

This kid has so many issues.

3) Case in point:


Drama Queen put this picture on Facebook with a caption that said something about him being too lazy to pick up the bottle. Lord, have mercy. And are you diggin' the new faux hawk look he has now?

4) You can tell when a person has spent plenty of time around our family. My sister-in-law proved herself an adequate judge when she said this about my kids the other day:

"Other than having volume issues, your kids are so normal."

Amen sister! And the kids pretty much proved her right one night when Ladies Man was using his outside voice inside at dinner and Drama Queen made a funny observation.

Drama Queen (to Ladies Man): Every time you open your mouth, Dad's eyebrows do this.

She bunched her eyebrows into a scowl. And she was right! It was almost like Kevin had no control over it.

Ladies Man: Do I make you crazy, Dad?

Scowling eyebrows.

Drama Queen: Ha! See!

A weird squeak out of Ladies Man.

Scowling eyebrows.

Ladies Man: Do I annoy you, Dad?

Scowling eyebrows.

The kids could hardly take it, laughing their heads off, and soon Kevin grew weary of it too.

Kevin: Are you done eating yet? Isn't it about time you left the table?

5) Miss Innocent One: I should start a blog.

Ladies Man: That would be boring. What would you write about?

Miss Innocent One: My blog would be interesting. I'm the one who watches everything. You guys do all the talking while I take it all in.

Ladies Man: Our family is boring.

Miss Innocent One: Are you kidding me? Have you been listening to any conversations we have?

You go, girl. I think your blog would be a hoot.

6) The salad was gone before Drama Queen got any so I told her to go rip up some more lettuce for herself. When she finally came back to the dinner table she sat down with a sigh.

Kevin: What?

Drama Queen: That was such a hassle.

We said nothing, only smiled at each other and stifled our giggles.

Drama Queen: What?

Kevin: Welcome to your mother's world. This is one tiny piece of what you'll have to do the rest of your life.

Yeah, I was a little smug about it. These opportunities don't present themselves very often.

7) We're going through Drummer Boy withdrawal at our house. We haven't spent any time with him in three weeks! I saw him briefly yesterday, but it wasn't enough. Luckily we'll all be at a wedding this weekend and get to see him try his hand at being a groomsman. Should be fun. All of the groomsmen are forming a worship band to play prior to the wedding. And he said something about them wearing Chuck Taylor's too. Sounds like they'll be funking it up.

Oh no. Suddenly, as I imagine my kids' response to that last sentence, I feel like an old person. I'm sure "funking it up" is old school. How is it I've already lost my edge in being aware of modern vernacular. Oh brother, using the word vernacular surely pushes me into the nerd category. I guess it's the mother's job to give her kids something to make fun of. After all, if I wasn't so uncool, how would they know they were?

I've reached the point of no return. I better quit before I give them too much ammunition. Have a terrific weekend, friends, and find more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.